The corner of Jamaica where it's always happy hour
Stephen Macdonald encounters deadly cocktails, dolphins and old-world allure on a trip to the island’s legendary resort
TEDDY the barman confides wistfully that he just missed the chance to serve a rum punch to Marilyn Monroe back in 1957. He joined the staff of Jamaica Inn in Ocho Rios shortly after her visit, but he has shaken a cocktail for supermodel Kate Moss and former British prime minister John Major.
Teddy is a legend here, having notched up almost 60 years working at one of the most famous hotels in the Caribbean.
The hotel’s owner, Peter Morrow, however, can remember watching Marilyn being photographed with her new husband Arthur Miller beside the beach at Jamaica Inn. ‘She posed just here,’ says Peter, pointing to the spot.
The then most famous couple in the world had spent several days on the island on honeymoon at Moon Point, the luxurious villa of Lady Pamela Bird, an English aristocrat, before returning, via Jamaica Inn, to New York.
Jacket and tie were then obligatory at this last vestige of colonialstyle entertaining in the Caribbean. Jamaica Inn is still traditional but with a definite modern twist, as ageing rock stars now slip into view alongside dowagers and American grandes dames, who have been coming back for the past 30 years. Think cucumber sandwiches at tea time, yet also young surfers among the guests.
Jamaica Inn evokes tranquillity and calm with its white-painted cottages, as well as old-school charm (the waiters wear white jackets in the evenings). There are no TVs in the rooms but modern touches include a holistic spa.
For such a small place, Jamaica has had a massive influence on the world. It celebrated 50 years of independence in 2012, and evokes passion and affection even in those who have never visited, and brings a dreamy nostalgia to those who have.
Our day starts at breakfast with sergeant fish being fed titbits in the turquoise sea just below the terrace. The tables feature pink tablecloths and white napkins – a wonderful contrast to the cobalt-blue sky. The croquet lawn is just yards from the sea – actor Rupert Everett is reputed to beat all-comers. Sepia photographs of famous faces in the library attest to the hotel’s glamorous past, while backgammon boards still sit on the tables. Jamaica Inn has undergone evolutionary change and reinvented its high standards without trying to become gourmet or seeming stuffy. Guests meander up from their waterside cottages past almond and Ethiopian apple trees to Teddy’s Bar, where the dirty banana cocktails are truly lethal. Meanwhile, the food here is fresh, simple and truly delicious.
For those who want a wonderful close-up sight of the natural world, visit at the right time of year and you’ll be able to spot turtles hatching on the beach.
At the time of our visit, there were reports that Jamaica was
unsafe after a burst of gun crime in the capital, Kingston. But the city is far from the north coast, and the only thing remotely dangerous in Ocho Rios was the amount of rum being dispensed by Teddy at his bar.
Leaving the resort one day, we headed to the nearby Dolphin Cove, a place where people can see and swim with dolphins. Our journey took us past banana trees, orange groves, mystic mountains and hawkers in the street selling Jamaican flags and toy guitars made from bamboo.
Entering the water, I quickly discovered that the gun-metal grey nose of a dolphin is hard and smooth, almost synthetic.
These delightful creatures are sleek and engaging, and somehow perfectly behaved. They jumped, barked, glided, and appeared to smile and laugh as they cavorted with us in the water.
We swam with them in a roped-off area and got so close to the dolphins that we were able to ‘shake hands’ with their flippers. It was a little like touching the rubber casing of a watch.
Fifteen minutes from the cove is GoldenEye, which began life as a spartan bungalow on a clifftop, and is where Ian Fleming wrote some of his James Bond books.
A few years ago, GoldenEye was transformed into a luxurious resort with extraordinary lagoon villas – you can even stay in the room where Fleming’s original writing desk remains.
There is a beachside pool and lively beach bar where songs from the Island Records’ back catalogue – the famous label was formed on the island – play night and day.
For those who like music at the bar and do not want complete tranquillity, this is the place to be.
After our lively outing, it was good to return to the more stately Jamaica Inn and the comfort of our cottage, with its huge lounge and veranda overlooking the sea.
We also had our own plunge pool, which can be heated. This might seem an unnecessary luxury in the Caribbean, but it is a surprisingly good idea as it means you can swim late at night or early in the morning and never feel the slightest chill.
After a refreshing dip, there was only one thing to do: head back to Teddy’s for an early evening cocktail and listen to more fascinating stories from his past.