WHERE TO FIND THE COLUMNISTS WHOSE INSIGHTS YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS:
Aisling O’Loughlin: Tolerance at the festive table
There’s the head of a wild boar over the sink of the house I rent in Provence, which is a bit weird because only the other day I bumped into a real-life wild boar walking home from the supermarket. What are the chances? That’s not to mention the time the wild boar ate my undies while camping this summer in the woods. At least I think it was a wild boar...
So many stories to tell from 2019. Where to begin? Obviously I Googled “wild boar spirit animal” after so many freaky coincidences and, apparently, it can be taken two ways. I’m going with it being a “sign of abundance, courage and power” and not “stubbornness, conflict and disorder”. I talk to the wild boar over the sink from time to time. The conversation is fairly one-sided, but he knows I come in peace. He sees me chopping my veggies in earnest and might even peek at the odd chunk of goat’s cheese disappear with a veganish sleight of hand. He never blabs.
The real-life one I met on the footpath outside Intermarché the other day looked at me with as much surprise as I greeted him. We both stopped in our tracks, eyed up the risk of each other’s presence and turned calmly in the opposite direction. Once I’d clocked the poor devil divert through the vineyards, I rerouted homebound. There will be no sanglier (wild boar) on my Christmas dinner table come the 25th. If I had my way we’d go the whole Holly White but I’m surrounded by omnivores, so the best I can do is make the fruit and veg side of things really special. Holly’s recipe e-book, which I’ve downloaded from www.holly.ie for a tenner, includes onion, leek and potato gratin, sage and onion gravy and vegan mince pies.
Have you seen the skit on YouTube by Just These Please called How to cook
Christmas Dinner in 2019? It starts with the line ‘God that’s a big turkey for three people’. The response, ‘What are you talking about? There’s loads of us.’ Turns out Dave eats gluten-free food, Jan can’t have cheese, Frank avoids fat, Tom is coeliac, Tim’s sugar-free, starch allergy. Stan can’t have nuts, no ifs or buts. No carbs for Sue after half two. Pam’s met a man who just eats ham. And on it goes. It’s a hoot, and perfectly reflects our times. We’re standing firm in our dietary preferences more boldly than ever, give or take the odd lump of cheese when nobody but the sanglier is looking. The traditionalists may want to have goose fat all over our roast spuds but what is Christmas if not a time for tolerance? If we can’t sit down and break bread, gluten-free or otherwise, with people who hold different views and taste buds to us, what are we about? Bring your own if you must, but let Christmas 2019 be the year we finally make room at the table for everyone.
‘We’re standing firm in our dietary preferences more boldly than ever’