SMOKES & DAGGERS
A mischievous mix of political asides with JOHN DRENNAN
THE attendance at the Fine Gael parliamentary party postBudget meeting was quite low. We are sure this had nothing to do with Simon Coveney playing the role of substitute teacher for Leo Varadkar, who is once again away (in France). One appropriately humble TD told Smokes: ‘We had a lovely time listening and listening to Simon talking and talking about what a superb job the Cabinet had done. Sometimes we are in danger of forgetting how fortunate we are to have such a brilliant Government, but Simon, by talking and talking and talking to us, is kind enough to ensure we never forget.’
DEPUTY Peadar Tóibín’s query to the Taoiseach on the number of State apologies in the past 10 years attracted the intriguing response of ‘awaiting answer’. Sorry seems to be the hardest word... to count.
A RARE moment of glasnost occurred between the Greens and the Healy-Raes during last week’s Budget debate when Ossian Smyth referred to how ‘Michael Healy-Rae made some very complimentary comments about the Green Party and its achievements in Government, and I want to thank him for his kind remarks’. For the record, what Mr Healy-Rae said was: ‘The Greens are doing exactly what they said they would. They’re doing even more than what they said they’d do. No one should be saying to the Greens oh ye deceived us, for everyone knew what ye were about when ye came into this Government’. Certainly a case of praising with faint damnations.
THE cruellest comment about the Budget that everyone has already forgotten came from one
Dáil mandarin who said: ‘It reminds one of the saying about how a camel is a horse designed by a committee.’ Except the difference is that even a camel can expect to be housed (albeit in a stable).
PORTMARNOCK Golf
Club is seeking State support to host The Open championship. It’s ‘a brilliant course… just infrastructure problems really’, was how it was phrased. But in North Dublin, infrastructure doesn’t grow on trees.