Which male foibles are on your ‘ick list’?

Saying ‘Perfecto!’ Driving at exactly the speed limit. Being too hamfisted to unhook a bra. Just three of the MANY things about men that irritate women so much they’ve taken to comparing their pet hates with friends. So...

YOU know what’s top of my ‘ick’ list? People who use the word ‘ick’. It’s like starting a sentence with ‘so’ or ordering a really complicated coffee when there’s a long queue. It just gets on my nerves. It’s a modern affectation, a form of passive-aggressive bullying that makes it seem as though the person experiencing the so-called ick (defined in the dictionary as ‘a sudden feeling of disgust that seems to come out of nowhere’) is the victim of some kind of unspeakable act, when in fact they are just gaslighting the object of their supposed revulsion.

The whole thing reminds me of bullies at school, the self-appointed cool kids who were always having a go at others for physical characteristics beyond their control, such as the colour of their hair, or the way they ran, or the size of their feet, or wearing glasses. Or just laughing at others simply because they happened to be a bit different.

Declaring that you have ‘the ick’ about someone is about making yourself look good at someone else’s expense. It’s just mean. You might have thought that in this ultra-woke, ultra-diversity-aware world, such things would be anathema, especially among the young. But apparently not.

It seems fine to be offended by the length of someone’s fingers, for example, or the way someone laughs, or the fact that they have a short neck. And do you know why it’s fine? Because they’re men.

For these so-called ‘ick lists’ are mostly compiled by women about men, and as we all know it’s acceptable to take the mickey out of men because… well, they’re men.

It’s the same logic that says it’s fine to use racist language about a white person because they’re white.

Some sections of society are deemed so beyond the pale they are exempt from the modern rules of respect and inclusion and all that hashtag ‘be kind’ stuff. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that blokes, and in particular straight white blokes, are pretty much the only people left on the planet about whom it is not only perfectly fine to be rude – it’s also actively encouraged.

DON’T get me wrong: men can have some very annoying habits. But so can women. I, myself, am guilty of too many to list here, but they include never finishing a cup of tea and leaving a small amount of liquid in the bottom of the cup so when someone else picks it up, they risk spilling cold tea on themselves; using my car as a (very messy) extension of my handbag; pathological plumping of sofa cushions; opening windows in winter (what can I say: I like fresh air); eating hummus out of the pot with my finger.

That’s why, for the most part, it’s best not to be too judgy about others: let she who is without ick cast the first stone.

Of course, there are some habits that are just plain unacceptable, such as not washing out the bath after you’ve shaved your legs, or using up the last of the loo paper and not replacing the roll.

And there are a few things on the list on these pages that I thoroughly agree with, such as being rude to waiters and chewing loudly. But the majority just seem like general intolerance on the part of the listmakers, an opportunity for mockery.

Whatever happened to sparing someone’s feelings? None of us is perfect. Do we need to be reminded of this fact? From time to time, probably. But should our annoying habits be highlighted for all to see in a way that can only demean and humiliate us? I don’t think so.