The Pope cannot undo the past and maybe can’t change the future but he instills hope

ITHOUGHT on the cusp of the Pope’s visit to Ireland that I would not go to see him. Not because I was doing something else, or committed to doing something more important. It was not because it was inconvenient to a busy life or because I couldn’t be bothered.

It was just because I didn’t feel the need to.

I thought I would watch the highlights on the news, read about it in the papers and tap into social media. Fleetingly I asked myself would I come to regret not bearing witness to such an iconic event because whether we agree or not, the Pope coming to a small island with a small population at a crucial point in the church’s history and infamy, is iconic.

The infinite back-log of clerical abuse and the intricate orchestration of cover-ups might be the obvious reason for my decision and if not obviously so, then unwittingly so. But I don’t think it was.

I am sickened and ashamed of what has happened to children, mothers, the LGBT community at the hands of the church. My church. And just for the record in respect to the children, can we call them children? Not “minors”. Maybe I am getting bogged down in semantics, but the use of the word “minors” somehow nullifies the fact that much of the victims were children. Much of the mothers were children too. So let’s not forget that, lest we do.

So where does a catholic like me go? You see, I was delighted the Pope was coming. I loved the excitement that surrounded his visit. I liked the fact that lots of people were going to see him and all told, it warms me to know that despite all the evil that has been perpetrated, that faith survives; perhaps not in the church but in God.

Faith has kept me safe, it has kept me sane and it has kept me believing not just in a God but in myself and others too. Do I need to attach it to the Catholic Church? No, I guess not. But I do.

Certainly, the pope came to a different Ireland than his predecessor. Anxiety, depression, social withdrawal, mental illness and suicide stalk our land. That is a lot of people without hope.

This Pope cannot undo the past and maybe he can’t change the future, but for the present he instills hope. So, can we not stop knocking his visit, trivialising his presence and negating his symbolism? Because the Pope and who he represents is important to many of us.

As it turned out I went to see the Pope in Croke Park. I changed my mind. I decided to go on a historical level, but I left the event on an emotional one. Faith was bolstered, faith was renewed.

Having the freedom to exercise religion, every religion, is our democratic right. Regrettably but I suppose inevitably, there has been a tendency to align those of us who celebrated the Pope’s visit, with the abandonment of people who have already been abandoned.

And for that I am sorry. That was never the intention.