TOM DEMPSEY COLUMN: NEVER TAKE YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY WHEN YOU’RE IN THE GAA!

WE ARE in unprecedented times and, regarding sport, Jurgen Klopp captured it very nicely when he said, ‘sport is the most important of the least important things’.

As we face the next few weeks of uncertainty, I hope everyone is keeping safe and reaching out to the many channels and people available if they need any assistance during the current situation.

Please pick up the phone if anything is needed as we are all in this together.

I have had a lot of time to reflect on sport and the wonderful role it plays in our lives, and I suppose the last couple of weeks have re-emphasised that we (myself included) probably take it too seriously rather than appreciating the social outlet that it offers to young and old alike.

I do believe this attitude will change somewhat over the next while, and over the weekend I took a little time to amuse myself by writing down some of the funny stories and characters that I have encountered over the years in G.A.A.

Without thinking too deeply, I very quickly had enough material to fill a book and had in the process lightened my day considerably.

We are good in this country at not taking ourselves too seriously, and there is no place better than in the G.A.A. to put you in your box if you are getting ahead of yourself.

Over 30 years ago, Wexford hurlers weren’t as recognisable as maybe the present players, and I was asked to present medals at an under-age event in Adamstown.

Having received several plaudits and completing my job, I was standing on stage beside the preparing D.J. when a little fella (whom I had presented a medal to five minutes earlier) approached me and asked had I any Guns and Roses songs.

Similarly, the week before the 1993 Leinster final, Buffers Alley were playing a tournament in Annacurra in Wicklow, and we were all invited up for tea in the local hall afterwards.

Having presented the Alley with the winners’ awards, I could see this giant Waterford Glass tray being brought up to the stage, and the master of ceremonies asking could Tom Dempsey, the Wexford captain, come on stage.

Thinking nothing of it, I followed the instruction, only to be handed the presentation with the words ‘could you pass that on to Tony Doran when you see him’.

The cheers and incredible amusement of my Alley team-mates stayed with me for a long time. Never take yourself too seriously in the G.A.A.

I have met some great characters over the years, but Michael Duignan and indeed all the Offaly players of the era were unique.

Michael told me that after one Leinster semi win over Laois, several players decided to celebrate until Tuesday.

Pádraig Horan, manager at the time, gave them the third degree when training resumed, and at a specially convened meeting he informed them that going on the beer and talking bullshit for two days wouldn’t win an All-Ireland for them.

An offended John Troy (what a player) could take no more and replied, ‘I hope you’re not including me in that Pádraig’, to which the manager said, ‘if the cap fits wear it John’.

Troy thought for a moment and murmured ‘well, I wasn’t talking bullshit’.

The Wexford dressing-room was full of characters (where do I start), and on one occasion before a Leinster final, Johnny Dooley, the Offaly dangerman, had a fractured thumb but was set to line out.

Just before leaving the dressing-room, our number 5 - Dooley’s direct opponent - asked which thumb was injured, to which it was strongly pointed out that he only had two thumbs.

I’ll leave you guess the players involved, answers on a postcard.

During one of our team meetings I (just for fun) suggested that Fitzy’s puck-outs weren’t of the necessary quality. I got a quick reply from Damien (who, for me, had no equal) to say that the only problem with the puck-out was that he might as well be landing them in a graveyard, which certainly put our forwards in their place.

I learned to keep my mouth shut at the next few meetings.

Lastly, I was lucky to be asked to launch Jim Berry’s incredible book, ‘October 2000’ which is a must read.

In it Jim tells of a great character of the area from yesteryear, Stephen Lee, who was cycling somewhere near Battlestown when he asked a local man how far it was to The Hook.

As the crow flies it is eight miles, the man responded, to which Stephen replied, ‘how far would it be if the crow was riding my bike?’

So many stories, so many characters, and so much enjoyment, and please God we will get back to all that soon.

In the meantime, stay safe, stay connected, and take care.