Be careful of emotional contagion

I once worked in an organisation with a person that was a ‘fault finder’. It took a while to work it out but the impact they had on everyone was devastating. They privately shared their concerns with me – and later I learned they did the same with everyone else.

Their comments were initially presented as well-intentioned. The person cared and wanted to improve things. They pointed out the small behaviours that others were doing that were against policy etc… Making the odd personal call…. not doing things as per xyz.

Gradually the comments became more pronounced and critical, focusing on how people ‘weren’t helping or serious’. Very soon everyone was watching out for what everyone else was doing wrong and focussing on the letter of what was important but missing out on the spirit of what was happening and entirely missing what the ‘we’ and so many individuals were doing right and exceptionally well.

Gradually an anxiety came into the team and adversely affected the culture. People became more cautious, stopped helping each other and mistrust entered.

With scientists, virologists, doctors, Government leaders and communities all around the world working hard to flatten the curve of Covid-19, there is another type of contagion which needs to be looked at – “emotional contagion”.

It is the process of catching other people’s emotions, both positive and negative. They can easily spread just like a virus and we can become infected quickly if our defences are low.

From infancy, we are all hard wired to automatically mimic body language, facial expressions and the tone of voice of others. We, then feel the projected emotions and act upon them, often feeling them as our own.

Negative emotions can very easily overwhelm us when we give them too much importance. It takes three positives to counter one negative.

While it can be hard at times to see beyond the challenges we as a society (or organisation or family) face now and will face in the coming days and months, we can also take heart from how people are coming together, helping one another and many other positives. It is important to see things in their right context and to have a mindset that will solve problems and not be cynical, negative, or overwhelmed by them if you want to move forward.

How to manage social contagion:

1. Notice how you are feeling. The drastic lifestyle changes and challenges people are experiencing since Covid-19 has unleashed a broad spectrum of feelings that can be difficult to navigate.

If you are afraid, notice that but don’t feed it. Instead be kind and compassionate. Ground yourself and face it according to your values. You will then access a deeper part of you which will offer solutions.

2. Be aware of what you are bringing to situations. The one quality all highly successful have in common is they are self-aware. And when others are flooding situations with negativity, try and put things into context and bring balance back.

3. Negative emotions spread fast and can be highly contagious and toxic. If you feel you are being pulled by them, take a short break. Go for a walk. Meditate. Do something to clear your mind. Limit the fear based content you consume.

4. Be yourself. More than ever, being authentic matters. There is nothing more hopeless than false positivity. Learn to manage your mood and shift gears mentally and emotionally. These are skills that can be learned. Everything passes.

5. Engage in Realistic Optimism: ‘The key to balancing realism and optimism is to embrace the paradox of realistic optimism. Practically, that means having the faith to tell the most hopeful and empowering story possible in any given situation, but also the willingness to confront difficult facts as they arise and deal with them directly’. Tony Schwartz, HBR.

Calodagh McCumiskey designs and delivers bespoke wellbeing at work programmes to grow people and companies. She also offers regular meditation classes, personal development workshops and wellbeing consultations to help people thrive 053 9140655 | info@spiritualearth.com | www.spiritualearth.com