Troubling online attacks on family highlight need for tougher laws Just leave me hanging on to my telephone, as Blondie almost said
OUT of the blue the Morrissey lyric came to me as I read an article about the Ryan family who featured in a Lidl ad and ended up being subjected to abuse and even a death threat online.
‘It’s so easy to laugh/It’s so easy to hate/It takes guts to be gentle and kind.’ is a lyric in I Know It’s Over. Racism sadly is not over and in the past in our country.
The Ryans are a multi-cultural Irish family who giving serious consideration to leaving the country because of the online abuse they got having appeared in a television and billboard campaign. Actor Fiona Ryan, her fiancé Jonathan Mathis who happens to come from England having been born in Brazil, and their 22-month-old son Jonah appeared in the ad.
The story brought me back to my childhood when a little boy – who happened to be African American and new to the community – was assaulted for no other reason than the colour of his skin. Having travelled to America several times and been aware that people come in all shapes, sizes and colours, I was shocked to see the boy assaulted after Mass one Sunday morning. Imagine how he felt!
Ireland has witnessed a huge influx of people from different countries – Eastern European, African, South American – the vast majority of whom have enriched our nation and broadened our minds.
As a people we have a reputation of being curtain twitchers. Our villages and towns have been described as valleys of the squinting windows. Many of us grew up in an oppressive Ireland, one ruled by the Catholic Church and by fear.
Today much of our interaction takes place on social media and unfortunately it is not a safe space either. Moreover it is not policed in any way.
Hate speech legislation is now 30 years old and needs to be replaced with more punitive, responsive legislation. Ms Ryan says people have abused them because of Jonathan’s Brazilian background.
She reported the abuse to the guards. However, she was told it was a ‘civil matter’ and that ‘they couldn’t do anything about it’.
Lidl said some of the abuse followed a tweet by former journalist Gemma O’Doherty who tweeted: ‘German dump @lidl_ireland gaslighting the Irish people with their multicultural version of ‘The Ryans’. Kidding no-one! Resist the Great Replacement wherever you can by giving this kip a wide berth. #ShopIrish #BuyIrish.’.
The company responded, saying: ‘We are very proud of our multicultural and diverse team and our customers across Ireland.’
But Ms Ryan said she was left ‘physically shaking’ when she first saw the offensive messages from people who commented on the tweet. The online reaction of the people commenting, whose intentions are to rant at the changing face of Irish society in some vague wish fulfilling attempt to magic an Ireland of old back into creation – need to be confined to the silence of their own minds.
Causing a mother and father to fear for their safety and the safety of their child reflects poorly on a country which is supposed to be welcoming. EDDERS, you can do this. Just give it to me.’
‘I’m really not so sure, sweetest. I am not finding this easy.’
‘Come on. Where is the bold, fearless man I married?’ ‘Oh dear! That wedding seems like an awful long time ago now. I know that bold and fearless man’s wife is still as lustrously, shimmeringly beautiful as ever, of course. But perhaps all that’s left of him is a shell.’
‘Rubbish. He is still bold enough to take a driver off the tee at the sixteenth, and to hell with the stubble field which awaits a hook.’ ‘I suppose so but maybe this is different.’
‘He is still fearless enough to stand up in company and perform ‘I Love a Lassie’ without instrumental accompaniment.’
‘Well that certainly is different. Singing Scottish ballads is a breeze. Giving up what I’ve been asked to give up is a head wrecker.’ ‘Enough of this nonsense. Hand it over.’
I did not hand it over. I clung to it as a shipwreck victim clings to a life-buoy. Hermione opened up her lap-top.
‘What are you doing, sugar plum?’
‘I am googling.’
‘Not airline flights, I hope. You’re not leaving me are you?’ ‘No, I am not leaving you. Not yet. I am looking up counsellors.’ ‘Counsellors?’
‘Yes, here is one who weans smokers off smoking with hypnosis.’ ‘I don’t smoke, honey bun.’
‘Here is another who tackles drug dependency by talking to his clients about childhood trauma.’
‘But I don’t take drugs, not so much as an aspirin.’
‘That is as maybe but you are quite clearly hooked all the same. If you cannot hand it over to me for 24 measly little hours, then you evidently have a problem. Perhaps you should see this woman who counsels on a range of problems from bulimia to binge drinking. I imagine she would find your case fascinating.’
My ‘case’ as Hermione calls it arose one evening after young Persephone and I tidied up the kitchen after our evening meal. I decided to provide some background enlightenment to the housework by switching my mobile to receive a podcast about chocolate bean farms in Ghana.
However, the finer points of the podcast were lost to me as our daughter insisted on playing a programme of rackety showbiz gossip about someone called Dustin Berber (or some such) on her iPhone. Turning up the volume on my Huawei provided only temporary assistance as she countered by raising the decibels coming from her Apple. The bedlam of phone wars then devolved into a war of increasingly bitter words.
Daughter accused father of imposing his obscure tastes on the rest of the family. Father accused daughter of being preoccupied with irrelevant trivia.
She called him an authoritarian. He called her an addict and then she threw down the gauntlet.
‘I am not an addict, father, and I can prove it. I will happily set aside my phone for a whole day, if you will do the same.’
The trap had been set and I could hardly wait to call her bluff. I did not believe for a moment that she was capable of going without Instagram and YouTube for five minutes, let alone an entire day.
It is well known that teenage girls are incapable of functioning phone-less. The only reason there is no research into this matter is that researchers attempting to take a smart phones off teenaged girls has suffered withering abuse and life threatening assault.
So I felt I was safe enough when I offered to give up mine for a day on the condition that Persephone did likewise. She took the bait straight away and it was agreed that Hermione would act as referee and holder of the hardware.
Next day our school bound daughter casually surrendered the iPhone but her father found parting to be an impossible sorrow…
‘Maybe this guy can help you, Medders. He encourages people with ‘issues’ to talk to their teddy bears. Or there’s a clinic here in town where they use acupuncture to treat psychological complaints…’