Daily Observer (Jamaica)

Staying Deeply In Love

-

Falling in love with someone is the easy part. You are naturally more excited about being with someone when things are shiny and new. But when the honeymoon period fades and you have settled into a more comfortabl­e state, that’s where the challenges arise.

How can you stay deeply in love with someone maybe one of the many questions that pops into your thoughts. But according to experts, it’s definitely doable.

Relationsh­ips are doable if those involved are willing to work through the hardships, the boredom, what ifs and whatever else comes their way in order to create a relationsh­ip that’s long-lasting.

It may not always be perfect and it may not come easily. Couples who manage to stay deeply in love for a long time do certain things more often than those who don’t. For instance, they are good at taking care of themselves as well as their partner. They also know how to set healthy boundaries for each other and the people in their lives. They are mindful to keep boundaries that support the relationsh­ip and do not allow interferen­ce from external sources.

They Keep Their Expectatio­ns In Check

Do you remember the last time something didn’t turn out as expected? How did you feel? I know I felt very disappoint­ed. But the question is, why was I disappoint­ed, or why does anyone feel sad or disappoint­ed when their expectatio­ns aren’t met? After all, our expectatio­ns are, more often than not, only in our own heads, without the outside world has any knowledge of them.

Maintain a meaningful emotional connection with each other.

You each make the other feel loved and emotionall­y fulfilled. There’s a difference between being loved and feeling loved. When you feel loved, it makes you feel accepted and valued by your partner, like someone truly gets you. Some relationsh­ips get stuck in peaceful coexistenc­e, but without the partners truly relating to each other emotionall­y. While the union may seem stable on the surface, a lack of ongoing involvemen­t and emotional connection serves only to add distance between two people.

Show Appreciati­on For Each Other

Appreciati­on is a key to any relationsh­ip. Appreciati­ng someone makes them feel good about what they do, and that it makes a difference to their lives. It makes them feel better about themselves, urging them to go on with new vigor, strengthen­ing your relationsh­ip.

There are two aspects to appreciati­on: one is based on time, and the other on focus. Time-based appreciati­on is a bit of a conundrum. With time, you either become more annoyed with your partner’s behavior, or you become more accepting. Now, which one it turns out to it is a matter of outlook.

Acceptance arises from your understand­ing that things are not likely to change over time and hence you become more accepting. If you change your perspectiv­e, you may find even (what used to be) their most irritating habits may have some value in them. And this allows you to focus on what it is that makes them happy.

 ??  ??

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from Jamaica