Learning your child’s love language.
CLATIN WILLIAMS, father of one, agrees that a son and a daughter should be shown love in a different way.
However, his beliefs aren’t within the purview of a society in which men are reluctant to show their boys affection because of the stereotype attached to the expression.
Instead, Williams referred to the different love languages, which outline ways to experience and express love.
According to him: “The reality is, we all have different love languages as illustrated by Gary Chapman in his book, Five Love
Languages. What your son interprets to mean love may not necessarily express love to your daughter. We must learn their love languages and express our love to them in that love language.”
On that note, the 33-year-old admitted the very unpopular sentiment, that absolutely nothing is wrong with men kissing their sons.
“I have no challenges kissing my son. In fact, I have been doing that from he was a baby,
and now he is 8 years old and I still do because he’s still OK with it.
“We must be aware that there are different stages of development. As he gets older, you must be mindful that he
may get uncomfortable with this, especially if it is not the cultural norm. If he becomes uncomfortable with it, then that’s the time you need to stop, respect his feelings and do what he is more comfortable with,” he
said, suggesting that this may be a hug.
In addition to the very important lesson of loving self and others, Williams, who serves as youth director at the Worship and Faith International Fellowship Church in Spanish Town, revealed that he would also want to cement in his son the principles of putting God first, and that he can be anything he desires to be.
He shared, “I would be happy if my son embraces the conclusion made by Solomon in Ecclesiastes 12:13, that the whole duty of man is to fear God and keep His commandment and walk with God from a young age until his time on earth is ended. I hope to convince him by doing the same thing and giving him a good example to follow.”
And of future ambitions, Williams told Family & Religion that he wants his son, Zaire Clatin, to make his own choices in life.
“He wants to be a pilot because I told him that when I was growing up, that’s what I wanted to be. His mom told him that she wants him to be a doctor and so he wants to be a doctor as well.
“After a school trip to the fire station, he wanted to be a fireman. I realised that as he gets exposed to different professions his desire changes. There are parents who force their desires on to children and pressure them to become something they really don’t want to be. I don’t want that for my son. I want him to make the choice for himself. All I want him to do is discover his true purpose, do what he does to the best of his ability, be happy with his choice and add value to the lives of others,” he said.