Are you ready to be a parent?
OBJECTIVES
1. Describe factors which assist in the preparation for parenthood.
2. Examine the characteristics of effective parenting.
According to the free Dictionary, a parent is one who begets, gives birth to, or nurtures and raises a child; a father and or mother.
What makes someone a parent? ________________________________ ________________________________
Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood.
■ Parenting refers to the aspects of raising a child, aside from the biological relationship.
■ Parenting is usually done by the biological parents of the child in question, although governments and society take a role as well.
■ There are children who are referred to as orphans, or they have been abandoned. These children receive parental care from non-parent blood relations.
■ Many children have been adopted, raised in foster care, or placed in orphanages.
HOW DO WE PREPARE FOR PARENTHOOD?
In preparation for parenthood, we need to be physically, economically, emotionally and psychologically ready. It is argued that parenthood is an ongoing learning experience. Everyone who wants to be a parent must prepare for this ‘adventure’. Kids are adorable, but they’re also ‘expensive’ and need lots of nurturing; therefore, we must prepare for them.
Please note:
1. Financially, having a baby to feed and clothe can put a strain on your budget and may mean giving up other things you want.
2. It’s important to research, read and get answers to any concerns you have, and get support for yourself and your baby.
3. Having a baby means making changes in your life. These can be wonderful and rewarding, but they may also involve making some difficult choices. As a parent, you will now spend more time at home with your baby and less time out with your friends.
4. As a parent, it is important to take care of yourself physically as well as emotionally. Having support can help you to balance your needs with the needs of your child. Your family, friends or even a doctor, counsellor or social worker can help you work out how best to do this.
5. Parenthood often keeps you on your toes — there will always be new things to learn and new changes to face.
6. There is a great asset to eating well, getting regular exercise, and relaxing; talking through problems will also help you stay healthy and in control of your life.
Suggest THREE bits of advice you would give to a new parent.
As a new parent, you should:
Get lots of rest. Sometimes having a child can make your sleep patterns irregular. Babies often need your attention at times when you want to rest or sleep. It’s important that you try to get some rest when your baby is sleeping so that you can catch up on lost sleep for yourself.
Have fun times with your baby. There are lots of great things you can do with your child. A parents’ group can be a good place for you to get some support and for you and your child to make new friends. It can also be a great social activity for both of you.
Getting help. There may be times when being a parent can get you down. If you feel like things are overwhelming you, it might be helpful to talk with someone like a counsellor, your local doctor or someone else you can trust.
As the child grows, parents must ensure they possess the following:
■ Problem-solving skills
■ Communication skills
■ Socialising skills
■ Disciplinary skills
■ Knowledge of good nutrition
■ Ability to show love and warmth
■ Money management skills
■ Developing your child’s sense of self: Your tone of voice, your body language, and your every expression will be absorbed by your children. Your words and actions as a parent affect their self-esteem more than anything else.
■ Praising accomplishments, however small, will make them feel proud; letting them do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. By contrast, belittling comments or comparing children unfavourably with others will make them feel worthless.
■ Make a point of finding something to praise every day. Be generous with rewards; your love, hugs, and compliments can work wonders and are often great rewards.
■ Discipline is necessary in every household. The goal of discipline is to help children choose acceptable behaviours and learn self-control. They may test the limits you establish for them, but they need those limits to grow into responsible adults.
■ Many parents find it rewarding to schedule social time with their children. So, create a ‘special time’ each week to be together and let your children help decide how to spend the time.
■ Children learn a lot about how to act by watching their parents. The younger they are, the more cues they take from you. Be aware that you’re constantly being observed by your kids.
■ Model the traits you wish to cultivate in your child/children: respect, friendliness, honesty, kindness, tolerance. Exhibit unselfish behaviour.
■ Make your expectations clear. If there is a problem, describe it, express your feelings, and invite your child to work on a solution with you. Be sure to include consequences. Make suggestions and offer choices. Be open to your child’s suggestions as well. Negotiate. It is believed that children who participate in decision-making are more motivated to carry them out.
■ As your child changes, you’ll gradually have to change your parenting style. What works with your child now won’t work as well in a year or two. Teens tend to look less to their parents and more to their peers for role models. However, continue to provide guidance, encouragement, and appropriate discipline, while allowing your teens to earn more independence. Finally, seize every available moment to make a connection!
1. Suggest THREE reasons we need to make adequate preparations for parenthood, then state two ways in which this may be accomplished in your community.
2. Suggest to the government of your country THREE ways in which it can help individuals to be effective parents. Explain why you think these ideas would help parents to be more effective.