Crying out for help

OF THE several emotive issues in this newspaper’s report of 12-year-old Karif Mitchenere’s drowning in Kingston Harbour on Wednesday, two were particularly poignant and ought to be of interest to Prime Minister Andrew Holness in his quest for a kinder, gentler Jamaica.

One was of the crisis in parenting and a plaintive cry for help in getting it right. The other is the tenuous, often despairing, emotional state of large swathes of the island’s children, especially boys.

Given the pain, and often a sense of guilt, that families endure when tragedies such as what happened to Karif occur, this newspaper hopes that this family receives the necessary support from their community and institutions of the State. The situation, in this case, demands it.

Karif lived on Mountain View Avenue, a tough neighbourhood in east Kingston, precisely under what situation is not clear. So, too, are the circumstances under which he went swimming with friends on a school day.

PUBLIC BICKERING

A painful element of this boy’s death was the public bickering at the scene between family members, apportioning blame. Which makes the issue of grief counselling even more critical.

What is known by way of the account of Maswin Millwood, the boy’s maternal grandmother, is that, despite educational challenges (like far too many Jamaican children in poor circumstances, he apparently read below his grade level), this was a generally good child.

But Ms Millwood said this: “Him nuh (he is not) rude, but him say him lack love.”

This, of course, doesn’t necessarily mean that the child’s parents or other members of the family didn’t have deep feelings for the boy. The difficulty, more likely, was an ability to show those emotions, either verbally, or in action, such as Ms Millwood suggested.

She had encouraged Karif to be taken out for ice cream, “rub a little … on his nose and kiss and say yuh love him, mek him see”.

Once the economic hurdle of going out for ice cream is scaled, this, on its face, would be an easy thing to do.

However, in a mini-survey two years ago, conducted by the National Parenting Supporting Commission (NPSC), a quarter of the parents with which the commission interacted said they didn’t know how to effectively communicate with their children. Additionally, nine out of 10 parents are incapable of having satisfying exchanges with their children.

It is not unreasonable to assume that, in these homes, there are often deep frustrations between parents and children, which may manifest in estrangement of approaches to discipline.

Indeed, according to Jamaica’s 2019 Survey of Living Conditions, for two-thirds of younger children, corporal punishment is the most common form of discipline at home, followed closely by “psychologically aggressive methods”.

AGGRESSIVE PUNISHMENT

Other studies have shown 70 per cent of children between ages two and 14 faced at least one form of physical or psychologically aggressive punishment from parents or other family members. The problem is across income strata, but worse in poorer households.

Boys, who are at risk of recruitment into gangs, tend to fear worse than girls in depressed social and economic environments. Six years ago, research by the children’s development expert, Professor Maureen Samms-Vaughan, showed that boys were subject to far greater violent approaches in discipline – such as being pinched and slapped – than girls.

“The findings, which show that punishment starts as early as 18 months, suggest that there is a misunderstanding of the developmental differences between boys and girls,” she said

In a series of articles in this newspaper in 2017, the social anthropologist reported that while both sexes faced great risks in Jamaica, boys were three times more likely than girls to be brutally beaten in homes. They were also three times more likely than girls to be constantly hungry and undernourished; suffer greater neglect by their fathers than girls; are expected to drop out of school when the family faces economic crisis; and are more quickly to be sent to reform homes than girls.

There was obvious wisdom in Ms Millwood’s analysis of the problems faced especially by poor Jamaican families and their children, and especially boys like her late grandson. Wisdom like hers should help to inform Prime Minister Holness’ planned initiative to transform values of attitudes in the island. There is a cry for help.

The opinions on this page, except for The Editorial, do not necessarily reflect the opinions of The Gleaner.