Betrayal: A dish best served close
AT THE end of each year, I always wonder what the new year will bring. I tend to go down the rabbit hole of trying to anticipate the future, see if I can come up with anything unique that I am hopeful will take place that year. However, you can never truly anticipate what a year is going to bring, no matter how hard you try.
January for me started off with a bang! It started off with betrayal. I shared a long-standing dream of mine with a dear family member. I expressed to this person that I have procrastinated on this dream of mine for far too long, kept it at a secret all this time, and now I am finally ready to make good on it and put it into action.
Well, you guessed it! This person completely took my idea and decided that it was such a good idea, that they were going to take it for themselves. The hardest part of the betrayal for me was the lack of remorse that the person showed once I expressed to them how I felt. This person even went as far as to say that they must “detach themselves from how I’m feeling and do this anyway”.
Is it not true, that one of the most painful factors about betrayal is that it never comes from strangers? It almost never comes from mere acquaintances. It always comes from the ones you love, trust, and confide in. That is the essence of betrayal. For one does not confide in mere acquaintances.
Even worst, when you express to this person how their actions have caused you to feel and they decide to do nothing, change nothing, and directly tell you that they have nothing to apologise for, well, well, well, the heat of betrayal cranks up several more degrees.
In the Bible, the writer of Psalms 55 experienced betrayal. For him, it was unbearable simply because of who it came from. In verses 12 to 14, he says “For it is not an enemy who reproaches me; for then I could bear it. Nor is it the one who hates me who has exalted himself against me; then I could hide from him. But it was you, a man my equal, my companion and my acquaintance. We took sweet counsel together and walked to the house of God in the throng”.
But, as with anything in life, we must ask ourselves what are the lessons we must learn from the things we face? Is it to temper our expectations of people? Is it to be quiet and careful about the things you want to achieve lest people discourage you from going after it – or worst, take the idea for themselves and act upon it? Yes, those are worthy things to keep in mind going forward.
However, an even greater lesson is this; if you have a heart that desires to be close to God, or if you have ever prayed to be ‘more like Jesus’, then prepare to go through the actual, practical training to get there and to obtain such a heart. For Jesus Himself, suffered the ultimate betrayal by a friend who walked with him, dined with him and who was so close to him that the channel of his betrayal was via a kiss! He betrayed Jesus for money; yes, personal gain.
Unfortunately, if you desire to be like Him, so too you must go through heart-breaking situations such as betrayal and with time, learn how to forgive such persons. It is not going to be easy. It is going to take a lot of tears and it will feel unfair. However, I believe that if you allow yourself to be purified in the fire of forgiving your traitors, then you will come out as pure gold and reap your reward.