I got pregnant for one of my students

Dear Pastor, I have a child, but he is not registered in his father’s name. I got involved with a student as a teacher. I just could not resist this boy. I found myself thinking about him.

I loved him so much that whenever I saw him talking to his schoolmates, I got very jealous. He was innocent of the whole thing. It took him a long time to understand that I loved him and wanted something to work out between us.

I had a boyfriend, but I used to admire this schoolboy. He was very ‘gifted’. His pants always had a bulge.

When this guy and I got close, he used to ask me for money, and I would give it to him. I also bought gifts for him.

I was living with my boyfriend, but while he was away, I invited this young man to the house, and we cooked and watched TV.

I asked him if he would like to have sex with me, and he was shocked.

He told me that he couldn’t have sex with his teacher, but before he left, I got him to have sex with me. We promised that we would keep it a secret between us.

I saw him at school a few days after and he asked me if he could come over again. I told him yes. We had sex again, so we ended up having sex twice without using protection. Dear G.D., I hope that this letter does not get you into trouble because if your boyfriend sees it, he will realise that you have cheated on him and that the child is for another man.

I hesitate to tell you how I feel about you. You had an affair with a student while you were living with your boyfriend.

You must have been really careless and carefree, or maybe you took leave of your senses.

This child deserves to know his biological father,

My boyfriend came back the same week, and we made love. I became pregnant, and I suspected that it was not for my boyfriend, but he believed that the child was his.

I was afraid to tell the student, but when I was about six months pregnant, he asked me if the child was his. I told him no.

So, the child is registered in my boyfriend’s name, but the more he grows, the more he is the spitting image of the former student, and it is bothering me now.

One of my relatives said to me that my son doesn’t have anything for my boyfriend, but my boyfriend has never said anything to me. He believes that the child is his. He accepts him.

My son loves him. The former student and I have never had sex again. I didn’t think that he could have got me pregnant, though I knew that he was 17.

Sometimes I look at my son and ask myself if it is fair for him not to know his real dad.

My boyfriend and I are not married, but how can I marry him when I know that the child I have is not his?

I would love to get pregnant for him, but so far, we have not been successful. I don’t know what is wrong, but I can’t say anything. Pastor, please, tell me what to do. G.D. but I know he is not mature enough to handle this matter. On the other hand, don’t you think that you should tell your boyfriend the truth?

If you were to do so now, this man may never forgive you, but if he knows for sure that he cannot impregnate a woman, he may forgive you for what you have done and remain with you. He might be comforted by the thought that no one knows that your child is not his biological child, and they may never laugh at him or tease him by saying that he is ‘shooting blanks’.

I confess that this is a difficult case to deal with. It is a risk regardless of how you look at it. If you tell him, the relationship might be over, and if you don’t tell him, he may find out in the future, especially if for some reason a DNA test has to be done.

You will have to make your own decision on this matter, but unless you are prepared for the worst, keep your mouth shut.

Perhaps when you have your own home and can live without this man, you may divulge the truth.

Pastor