The Star (Jamaica)

I had sex with the pastor who baptised me

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STAR, mi backslide the same night the baptise. Before anyone judge mi, let mi tell you how it go.

Mi is a party girl, but people always a tell mi say mi friend dem grudge mi and a work obeah pon mi. Every now and again when crusade keep in the place, mi always go stand up.

Anyway, one night, one new pastor come in the community, and as usual, mi deh a di back stand up in a shorts. The next ting mi know is that mi see the pastor a move through the crowd a come towards my direction. I quickly move out of him way, but him come hold on to mi and say: “Woman, why you a run from the man of God? Di spirit send mi fi yuh.”

Mi nah tell no lie, mi did feel shame because all eyes were on mi, and mi start wonder if the man a go start read out all mi dirty deeds. Mi did a sleep with mi neighbour babyfather, so mi wonder if him a go buss that out.

Mi knees dem get weak when him a walk with mi to the altar, and by this time, all the church people dem start get inna spirit. Pity they didn’t know that a frighten mi frighten of what may unfold and it wasn’t the Holy Spirit a drop mi a grung.

EXCITED FOR BAPTISM

Cut long story short, him never read out mi deeds, but him start tell mi how people envy mi and some other tings weh mi know go so. I became interested in his teachings, so every night after that mi deh a crusade. When the time come for baptism, mi did excited bad. Mi end up baptise and go home start use up mi olive oil the night and a sing the Jesus song dem.

About three hours after mi reach home, a di man dat screechy come a mi door. Me like fool let him in cause mi never want anyone see him. Mi tell him say mi is a changed person, and him nuh pay mi no mind, him just start kiss mi all over and mi just give it up.

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