Pastor knew I had sex on the riverbank

Dear Pastor

I have a problem. My girlfriend and I are both 20. We have been in love from the time we were in high school.

People in our community talk about us all the time. I grew up with my grandparents, and my girlfriend grew up with her parents. When she was 17, and I was 18, we spent some time together on a riverbank. We thought no one was seeing us.

We had sex and then went home. But by the time we went to church on Sunday morning, the pastor had heard about it and ‘preached on us’. We were so ashamed. My girlfriend did not even wait until the benediction.

She left for home. My grandmother asked me if it was true that we had sex and I told her it was. She said pastor should have called us and talked to us instead of preaching about it.

I am her first boyfriend and she is my first girlfriend. We are not planning to leave each other; we are planning to get married. But grandma said we should give ourselves another two years.

My girlfriend’s parents did not know that the pastor was talking about her. She did not admit anything to them. She is hoping to go to teachers’ college.

We are still wondering who saw us.

J.L.

Dear J.L.,

I am so sorry that the pastor did not meet with both of you and counselled you instead of embarrassing both of you from the pulpit.

However, both of you will learn from this incident that having sex on the riverbank was not the safest place to express love to each other.

Your girlfriend was very embarrassed and so were you, but you still have each other. You will learn from your mistake.

I like the advice from your grandmother concerning marriage. Give yourself a few more years before getting married to this beautiful young woman. By that time, she would have graduated from college.

I also hope that you would consider getting a college education also. Don’t hold anything against the pastor. He has not said anything to either of you. He was only preaching, and you can’t be sure he was talking about you guys.

Pastor