Teacher girlfriend thinks I’m no longer in her class
Dear Pastor,
I need your help. I am 30 years old and I have a girlfriend who is 25. I grew up doing farming. I went to high school and I have some passes, but when my sisters and brothers were interested in going to college, I decided to work on the farm with my father. We raised cattle, goats and chickens. My father gave me my own cattle. I have my own goats.
My girlfriend told me that she wants to go to teachers’ college, and my father encouraged me to help her. He told me that if I really want to prosper in life, I should not have many women. Sometimes when we were at the farm, we would cook and talk. My dad even told me about another woman that he had, who almost wrecked his life, and when he saw that she was going to wreck him, he pulled away from her and he told my mother what he had done. He said that my mother told the woman that if she would not leave him alone, she would beat her.
Pastor, my girlfriend started to teach at a high school and she now behaves as if what I am doing is not good enough for her. She is now going out with one of the male teachers. When I asked her about it she denied it, but people know because they have told me that they have seen them together.
I no longer give her money since she started working, and she is always complaining that her salary is not enough. I don’t want her to take my money to mind a man, but I love her so much. Whenever she asks me for money and I don’t give her; she says I don’t love her anymore.
This teacher guy who she is seeing lives alone, so my girlfriend goes to his house to visit him.
My girlfriend is living with relatives and she has to contribute to everything, and whenever she goes to the supermarket and buys her groceries, her relatives use up everything, so she wants us to live together. I don’t know if I want to do that. My father told me I am a grown man, so I should do whatever I want. I would like to hear from you. I know another woman who likes me, and I am beginning to like her too. Please give me your advice. S. love your girlfriend. There is no question about that. You have helped her to go to college. You have stayed with your father on the farm and you have tremendous rapport with your father. You haven’t said much about your mother, except that she was going to beat the woman who got involved with your father. Evidently, your mother caused that relationship to end.
Now that your girlfriend is teaching, she is looking on you as if you are not in her class. She is sadly mistaken. People are not telling lies about her. They know that she is having a relationship with her co-worker. She has denied it. If they are not having a relationship, why is she visiting him at his home?
You have taken the correct decision in not giving her more money, but you have to go further than that. You have to end the relationship because if you don’t, and you remain with her and continue to give her money, she will eat you down like how ‘chi-chi’ eat down wood. You don’t have to continue in this relationship. She is ungrateful. You don’t have children together, so move on. You will find another woman.
Before I go, let me say this to you: Don’t be embarrassed by the work you do. You are a farmer. You are helping to feed the nation. Save your money and don’t waste it on women. You know another woman who likes you, so get to know her and date her, but be very careful. Run the teacher out of your life. You will be better off without her.
Pastor