Not sure if I should take the pill

Dear Pastor,

I am 21 years old and I will be getting married on my birthday in October. My fiancé does not live in Jamaica. His visit to Jamaica will be short. We both agree that we do not want any children, so we will practise safe sex. My oldest sister told me that I should go on the Pill, so that my husband and I can enjoy sex skin to skin. I have not said that to my husband. I know he is expecting me to buy condoms and to keep them before we get married. We had sex the last time he was in Jamaica and he was not pleased with me because I did not purchase the condoms. After we had sex and he left, I worried for the entire month. I was so happy when my period came. My fiancé wants me to leave Jamaica and to live with him in New Jersey. I am looking forward to that. I would miss my country. I am a trained teacher. I was told that the Pill makes one fat. Is that true?

C.F.

Dear C.F.,

I would like to ask you this question, why is it that your husband cannot purchase the condoms? Why does he have to depend on you to do so? I am not saying that it is wrong for you to purchase them, but as a responsible gentleman, he can purchase them too. He could buy the type he likes, and he could ask a guy which one is the best one to purchase. However, you must not make an issue of it, especially when you realise that you are protecting yourself from getting pregnant. Men don’t ‘carry pregnancy’, so a great amount of weight, so to speak, is on the women to protect themselves. Concerning the contraceptive pill, I suggest that before you two get married, you should go to see your gynaecologist and discuss all your methods of contraception with him or her. Congratulations, I am glad that you are getting married, and I wish you and your husband the very best in life.

Pastor