Thinking about my sister’s

Dear Pastor,

I am 22 years old and I need your help. I have one sister and two brothers. One of my brothers is in America studying. I share a room with the one who is in Jamaica; my sister has her own room. A friend of my sister was spending time with us during the Christmas holidays. This girl is very pretty and I kept admiring her. Every time she puts on her pants, she shows up everything. She has a lovely shape.

My sister told me to take my eyes off her because she has her boyfriend and he is in medical school. Even after she left the house, my thoughts were on her. I found myself having erections because of her. I have to keep pushing my hand in my pocket and holding my penis down. I do not know if that is normal. I have seen this girl in shorts, but I have never touched her or said anything rude to her.

I do not have a girlfriend. am wondering if what I am experiencing is a good reason to have a girlfriend. When I was in high school, I had friends but I didn’t have

these sudden erections, and I didn’t feel turned on by the girls when they were in sport gear. But my sister’s friend turned me on, and my sister observed that I was always staring at her. What do you think is my problem? Do you think I am ready to have a woman in my life? I know I am not ready for marriage, but sometimes I do have a great urge to be with a woman. Perhaps if my sister was not around, I would have tried to have a relationship with her friend.

E.G.

Dear E.G.,

Let me try to set your mind at ease. It is not unusual for young men to have erections when they see pretty girls passing by.

That is why young men ought to be told to control themselves and not touch women, unless they are having intimate relationships with these women. But even at that time, they ought to know how to control themselves. Men may get erections because of the sight of a pretty girl in shorts. Sometimes she does not even have to be wearing shorts; tight-fitted jeans that show up her curves may cause some men to have erections. You might be surprised that even the type of perfume a woman may be wearing may trigger the brain of a man and cause him to release hormones that cause him to experience an erection. What I am trying to say, sir, is that nothing is psychologically or physically wrong with you. So don’t believe that you are the naughtiest guy in town. Just learn to control yourself.

Pastor