I LOVE SEX

Dear Pastor,

I am 23 years old and my boyfriend is 24. This man and I have been living in the same community since we were teenagers.

He told me that he has always had his eyes on me. But because I had a boyfriend, he did not want to get between us. My ex-boyfriend and I broke up because he got one of my friends pregnant and I told him that I was not going to share him with this girl. He told me it was a mistake, but I didn’t want to get back with him. I spoke to the girl and she told me that he told her that he and I did not have anything going any more, which was a lie.

When my present boyfriend heard that this guy and I had broken up, he sent a message to me through one of my brothers. I contacted him and we dated for a while until we started to live together. He is a very responsible man. I did not do very well in school; I only have four subjects. So now I am going to evening classes. Every night before we go to bed, he goes through my books and he questions me on the topic.

My former boyfriend wanted to have sex with me every day, but my present boyfriend is satisfied if we only have sex twice a week. Sometimes when I want to have sex, I have to wake him up. He has even slapped me a couple of times because I woke him. I don’t mean that he slaps me to hurt me, but sometimes I strip myself to let him know that I need him. He tells me that rude girls always get themselves into trouble. But he will not get me pregnant because he wants to see me turn out to be somebody.

I told him that I am not ashamed to say I love to have sex, so he should give me what I want and not encourage me to go to somebody else. He said good girls don’t talk that way, but if I want to go to somebody else, I should tell him and don’t allow him to waste his money on me. I was only joking when I said that, but he did not take that for a joke.

This man makes me feel that I am somebody’s child. We are living in a nice house and he has just bought a nice car. He has got someone to teach me to drive. Do you think that I am bad because I want to have sex more often? I would love for you to tell me the truth.

T.L.

Dear T.L.,

This man is trying to tell you that your education should come first. It is said that couples living together have sex about four or five times per week and that is quite normal.

There are some women who have sex every night; they demand sex from their men. A gentleman told me that he has to have sex with his wife every night and unless he complies, she will not sleep. You should be happy to have a man who is paying for you to go back to school and who sees to it that you do your schoolwork.

I believe you when you said you were only joking when you threatened to go with another man if your present boyfriend fails to satisfy you or to meet your sexual demands. Don’t threaten your boyfriend; he may think that you are serious in your threats and run you away. I wish you well; study hard.

Pastor

Sometimes when I want to have sex, I have to wake him up. He has even slapped me a couple of times because I woke him.