Grandma refuses to take boy’s diabetes ‘seriously’
Dear Abby: I am a 29-year-old single mother of two small children. My 5-year-old son was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. I’m the only one in my family who has been trained in his care, so I understand the importance of a healthy diet, proper insulin dosage, checking his blood sugar, etc., and that unless his diabetes is properly managed, it could lead to serious health issues — even death.
I have explained these things to my mother and attempted to train her several times, yet she continues to do things she shouldn’t be doing. She stops by my house almost every night with “treats” like candy, ice cream, chocolate bars, doughnuts, etc. When I get upset about it, she’ll casually reply, “Oh, whatever. If you dose him for the carbs in it, he’s fine,” which is not the case. Yes, he can have a treat now and then, but overall, he needs to stay away from that stuff.
It is extremely frustrating that she refuses to listen to me and continues to disrespect my wishes. I don’t know what else to do. We have fought repeatedly over this, and she keeps telling me I’m “overreacting.” I’m terrified my son will have permanent damage because of this. How do I get her to stop and listen to me? — Frustrated in Wisconsin
Dear frustrated: You have allowed your son’s medical condition to become a power struggle between you and your mother. Schedule an appointment with your son’s pediatrician so your mother can have the facts of life explained to her. If that doesn’t help her to accept reality, then understand that she can’t be trusted. Do not allow her to drop by with goodies, and supervise any contact he has with her. It is your job to protect your little boy, even from your obtuse mother, if necessary.
Dear Abby: My husband and I have a wonderful life and much to be thankful for, but we have no children and are usually alone on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Everyone makes such a fuss about sharing these holidays with loved ones, but I become depressed during this season.
I do volunteer work on these holidays, but still feel sad and like everyone else in the country is having a better time than I am. Any suggestions?
— Not so jolly in Arizona Dear not so jolly: You must be a new reader of my column or you would know that every year around holiday time I receive letters from people like you, expressing that rather than feeling joyful and elated, they feel depressed and deprived. Some of it may be the result of the incessant marketing of these holidays, which gives the impression that “everyone” is having a grand old time sipping cider, stuffing themselves with turkey and caroling under the windows of their neighbors.
An antidote for your holiday blues might be to do more than volunteer. Why don’t you and your husband plan to do something special to treat yourselves, rather than stay home feeling like everyone else is enjoying themselves? Choose a different destination each year to visit and learn about.
Or invite some friends or acquaintances to join you at home. There’s a saying that misery loves company, and in your case, company might be the solution to the problem.