Con­grat­u­la­tions, cab­bage! May the same ap­ply to fat­teh and mas­gouf!

Kuwait Times - - FROM THE ARABIC PRESS - By Ad­nan Farzat

In my name and on be­half of her­itage lovers who are close to me, we do ex­tend our hearti­est con­grat­u­la­tions to ‘cab­bage’, be­cause it is about to be clas­si­fied as part of her­itage by UNESCO, and thus a cab­bage dish will be treated just like all other mon­u­ments pro­tected by UNESCO in Iraq and Syria, ones that were shat­tered to dust right be­fore their eyes while they did noth­ing but blueprint them in 3D, hop­ing to re­build them some­day. See­ing those mon­u­ments will be more like watch­ing a 3D movie and we will imag­ine that we are ac­tu­ally tour­ing them, then laugh at what we did once the movie fin­ishes.

The BBC said UNESCO was about to add the fa­mous Korean dish kim­chi (pick­led cab­bage) to a list of cul­tural her­itage items. We con­grat­u­late them and beg their par­don for not con­grat­u­lat­ing them when they were awarded the ti­tle, be­cause we were busy watch­ing the winged bull statue in Iraq and Palmyra mon­u­ments in Syria turn into ashes. How­ever, this is no ex­cuse for us, be­cause the liv­ing are more im­por­tant than the dead. What if stone mon­u­ments that have ex­isted for thou­sands of years get de­stroyed, com­pared to a hot de­li­cious spicy and sour dish of cab­bage?!

To avoid be­ing taken lightly in what I am say­ing about kim­chi, this par­tic­u­lar dish has had many priv­i­leges that many peo­ple did not. In 2008, it was taken into space by a South Korean as­tro­naut. There­fore, UNESCO ought to give due care to cab­bage even more than it ever gave to our de­stroyed mon­u­ments. It should ap­point a spe­cial guard to each and ev­ery cab­bage dish to pro­tect it from theft or be­ing van­dal­ized. Who knows, some­one might in­trude in some­body’s cab­bage dish in a restau­rant af­ter see­ing nices­melling steam com­ing out and reach out to steal a bite!

It would also be a dis­as­ter if cab­bage crops were dam­aged by the same frost and bliz­zards killing refugees in camps they have been dis­placed into. What if cab­bage crops die out? Will the Kore­ans make the same dish us­ing frozen cab­bage? If they did, will UNESCO pro­tect frozen cab­bage as well? The sit­u­a­tion is very dan­ger­ous and calls for im­me­di­ate ac­tion, be­cause as we know, North Korea has nu­clear pow­ers.

I wish the UNESCO would, be­sides pro­tect­ing Iraqi and Syr­ian mon­u­ments, pro­tect two fa­mous Arab dishes - fat­teh in the Le­vant and mas­gouf fish in Iraq.

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