In pursuit of finding ‘work-life balance’
KUWAIT: Your life is happening now, right in front of you, in the stolen moments that you spend with your family, friends, or even with yourself, but you are too busy to appreciate it, as your mind is entirely occupied with the next task of work that you must finish. In a world that excessively promotes productivity and celebrates successful icons and entrepreneurs, the phenomenon of overworking is becoming increasingly prevalent day by day, diverting our attention from the present moment and fixating it only on the future.
This trend raises a fundamental question: Is our relentless drive to work truly motivated by ambition, or are there deeper, perhaps unconscious, motives at play? Fatma Habib, a content creator and coach, embarked on a ninety-minute group discussion titled “The Philosophy of Balancing Life and Work” to find answers to this question.
Habib is one of the many people who struggle with this conflict, which she shared with the audience at the beginning of the session. “It started when my son was younger, when I used to leave the house in the morning and return at midnight for the sake of running my personal business,” she said. That’s when she felt like standing in the middle of two lanes, unable to choose which voice to follow— the voice that told her, “It’s fine. You are doing it for your son’s future,” and the other questioned, “Does your son really need your work, or does he need you to be there for him?”
From being solely a source of income, work has transformed into an addiction from which many struggle to recover. According to Habib, the motives fueling their extreme productivity appear to stem from a deeper purpose that gives alternate meaning to their existence. She said that perhaps it stems from a thirst for knowledge, leading some to pursue academic jobs that keep them in an avid learning process; it’s a way of achieving a sense of freedom through financial independence; or maybe it’s derived from the desire to change the world or add value to others’ lives, which is often found in professions such as teaching, medicine, or journalism.
While these are some of the healthy motives, she highlighted others that aren’t. For instance, escaping reality might be a very common motive, where one can distance themselves from family-related problems or from other social issues by immersing themselves in their professional life. Sometimes, it also serves as a form of painkiller, silencing inner voices and preventing negative emotions from surfacing. If someone realizes that their reasons for working are rooted in negative emotions, Habib recommends finding alternative ways to address these feelings instead of risking becoming overly consumed by work at the expense of other aspects of their lives.
Additionally, she highlighted one of the most toxic motivations that may drive individuals, wherein many seek a sense of self-actualization through work-related achievements, perceiving themselves as heroes in the eyes of those around them. The environment that we have grown up in plays a great role in shaping the personality of the hero that we want to maintain, she said. Maybe being burdened with responsibilities that are heavier than your shoulders since a young age or being blamed by your parents for not achieving high grades might be possible reasons for driving this desire. “If you notice that any of these are one of the reasons motivating you for success, You must stop determining your worth based on how others perceive you because your sense of selfworth should always come from inside,” she said.
Unfortunately, many individuals are unaware of the underlying motives driving overwork, leading them to experience burnout before realizing the need to address this internal struggle. Habib emphasized the importance of recognizing these motives as the initial step toward change, followed by taking action to embark on a transformative journey. “There’s no quick fix for reconciling the conflict between work and life. Simply take one small step and let your mind adapt to the upcoming change,” she advised. For instance, she suggested gradually reducing work hours, such as leaving the office an hour earlier if you are accustomed to 12-hour days, with the belief that eventually significant shifts will occur.
Habib further emphasized her point by referencing a quote from the Christopher Robin movie: “I always get to where I am going by walking away from where I have been,” which explains that the only way of overcoming the problem is by embarking on a new path to follow, letting go of the old habits that have been holding them back from becoming the person they aspire to be.