How to flourish in a relationship

introduce a new relationship in your life without losing yourself?

Here are some key concepts of what you can compromise on and what you should retain when you’re in a relationship, so that both of you can flourish.

KeeP YOUR iDenTiTY

Parts of having a great understanding of self mean that you know exactly who you are without having to compromise on your beliefs and your characteristics. One of the clearest cases of giving up your identity is when women change their names to follow their husbands’.

Your name is so much a part of your identity and giving it up can mean you let go a part of who you are as you adopt another. Not everyone can have a say in that as it is how the system works.

However, you can still choose to be called by your own name rather than make others call you Mrs So and So, after your husband.

Other aspects of losing your identity involve adopting your partners’ behaviour, mannerisms, beliefs and ways of doing things rather than staying true to yourself.

YOUR HAPPineSS

The art of getting to know what makes us happy is an intrinsic road of self-awareness and self-love. It may be as simple as staying in your hot tub to destress after a long week or burying yourself in your favourite novel or perhaps just catching up for coffee with friends — rituals which were the norm for you and kept you happy before you had a partner.

You need not exclude these things from your life’s equation just because you have a partner. Some people forget this and they end up losing themselves and doing only what their partner likes. Their own time ends up being forsaken. This should not happen if you wish to stay true to self and maintain a balanced relationship.

YOUR gOAlS AnD DReAMS

A typical example of this is when women take a break from or give up their passions or career to care for a child. They may tell themselves that they will go back to work when the child grows up. But it’s often the case that a next one may follow and in the end, their original plan never comes to fruition.

As a consequence, some feel trapped and resent their life; but there will also be those who feel that motherhood is the best thing to have ever happened to them. Whichever way you view it, do ensure that your goals, dreams and aspirations are still in mind even if you are in a relationship or starting a family.

It is important to have a passion as that is the one thing that gives fuel to life and motivates us to carry on. It gives us a sense of purpose, not only for ourselves but also to the larger community.

It can be as simple as being a source of inspiration as a mother in a household or a business woman in a conglomerate. Either way, we inspire those around us to live life to the fullest, whether we’re in a relationship or not.