New Straits Times

Owning up to our mistakes

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MAYBE you yelled at them. Maybe you forgot to do something. Or maybe you did something that annoyed them. Whatever it was, your children are mad at you. How would you feel?

Many parents have shared that it’s the kind of feeling that they’d rather forget. The feeling tends to become stronger days later once we realise the full gravity of our action. Their innocent and cute little faces further compound the guilty feeling, when it dawns that we may have broken their little hearts.

Of course it’s ideal if we’re able to avoid making any mistakes. You can probably achieve that by choosing not to do anything.

Unfortunat­ely, you and I know that that’s not an option. For most people, and especially parents, we’re expected to do a lot of things. In fact, not doing anything could be a mistake in itself.

For example, parents can avoid scolding their children by spending more time at work. But that’s also a mistake because they’re then neglecting their duties.

Similarly, spouses can avoid arguments and protect their feelings by not talking. Again, that’s also a mistake because it puts an end to communicat­ion. The only option is to continue doing what we must do because it’s virtually impossible to avoid making mistakes.

WE’rE ONLY HUMAN

Actually, making mistakes isn’t all that bad. Why? Because no one is perfect. In fact, making mistakes prove that we’re human — and that’s good. It gives us the opportunit­y to take some risks, allows us to give our best and not to worry too much about the outcome.

We may make mistakes and hurt those we love. But that shouldn’t stop us from loving them anyway. Our children may sometimes get mad with our decisions. But that shouldn’t stop us from making more decisions for their best interests.

Our spouses may be offended by our advice but that shouldn’t stop us from giving sincere advice.

Accept that mistakes can, and will, happen. By accepting this, we’ll liberate ourselves from unnecessar­y worries, fears and guilty feelings. The freedom will put us on the right path to happiness. We can now focus on doing the right things like loving and spending more time with the family.

The good news is that resolving issues isn’t that difficult. All we need to do is utter the three magic words, “I am sorry!” More often than not, the smiles will return, and the relationsh­ip will grow even stronger.

Yes, it takes a lot of courage to own up and sincerely utter those powerful words, but the outcome is worth it. Almost immediatel­y, we end up liberating the other party, and ourselves, from all the misery, confusion and bitterness.

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 ?? Zaid MohaMad ?? SMART PARENTING COACHES AND TRAINS PARENTS TO EXPERIENCE HAPPIER HOMES AND MORE PRODUCTIVE WORKPLACES. REACH HIM AT ZAID@ SMARTPAREN­TS. COM.MY
Zaid MohaMad SMART PARENTING COACHES AND TRAINS PARENTS TO EXPERIENCE HAPPIER HOMES AND MORE PRODUCTIVE WORKPLACES. REACH HIM AT ZAID@ SMARTPAREN­TS. COM.MY

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