Not all parents understand what is education

RECENTLY, I was invited to write an article for a magazine.

I interviewed a teacher with 18 years experience teaching in Chinese primary schools.

We talked about the “tuition trend” facing students nowadays. Every day, they get up at 7am, only to return home at 10pm. Besides school, the other half of their daily lives is spent at tuition centres. Rarely do they get the chance to take a breather. Every day, they go to bed tired, yet still have to wake up before sunrise to be in time for school.

During the interview, the teacher told me the story of several students who skipped class. Five of them admitted to truancy and after further interrogation, he discovered the reason why –they were simply too tired to attend class.

There are many students in the same boat. Apart from school tutorials, they need to attend after-school tuition as well -- five days a week. Every night, they spend one and a half hours at tuition centres -- from 8:30pm to 10pm. Sometimes even on Saturdays.

A typical scenario: In the morning, a student wakes up,brushes his or her teeth, washes his or her face and after a quick breakfast, it’s the same routine all over again -- school and tuition and more tuition. It’s this tiring routine that is behind students choosing to skip class.

The teacher said he told the parents their children were tired out by their heavy school-cum-tuition timetable. He thought when the parents knew the true situation, they would reduce their children’s crippling workload and allow them more time to rest -- and play.

However, this was not what happened. In one instance, when a student returned home (apparently after skipping class), his mother caned him and then gave him the “silent treatment” as further punishment instead of trying find out the root cause – such as fatigue from an overdose of school and tuition -- and the lack of rest.

The mother’s sulky action did the student’s confidence and self-esteem not one bit of good.

Another student had his freedom curtailed by his mother -- he was not allowed to call friends and his electronics were confiscated.

For most parents, tiredness is not an acceptable reason to not go to school and tuition. Nowadays, “being worn out from too much tuition” is an enervation most students have to put up with.

The teacher said he was upset. He thought he was upholding his responsibility as a teacher when he told the parents about their children being worn out from too much school and tuition and not having adequate time to rest.

The teacher thought the parents would understand but instead, they stuck to their old thinking and carried on as usual.

The teacher believed that when a child has disciplinary problems, it could be due the parents’ peremptory attitude and not the child’s fault per se. The fact is that not all parentsknow how to educate their children properly.

My child would be attending Primary One next year. I shudder just thinking about how to give my child the best learning environment.

Undeniably, Chinese primary schools emphasise on grades and results but education is not all about passing exams. It’s also about shaping a good personality, a positive conduct and correct values. Of course, my child has not started schooling yet, and I am not sure if I will be a “performanceoriented” parent or not but I certainly hope I will not be one who desperately shoves tuition down a child’s throat for the mere sake of good results.

From countless interviews, I have gathered that children today are just too tired -- from an overload of school and tuition and the lack of rest -- to perform at their best.

I hope one day when my child comes home and tells me “mum, I am too tired,” I, as a parent, will try my best to understand and act accordingly to “rescue” him from the debilitating situation many parents have foisted on their children. (Translated from Oriental Daily)