The dangers of unsolicited and unqualified advice
‘THE road to hell is paved with good intentions’ is an aphorism I understand too well. Since I publicly revealed that I was diagnosed with chronic kidney disease 13 years ago, there has never been short of well-meaning people who are more than eager to share folk remedies, alternative therapies and supplements that could purportedly help my kidneys recover.
This reminded me of the scenario that was being played out by people who thought I could walk again if I was willing to subject myself to all sorts of unproven treatments. Thirty years ago, my father forked out RM500 for two packets of herbs containing bits, supposedly porcupine bezoar stone, the seller claimed could regrow my damaged spinal cord. It is needless for me to say if that worked or not.
I am reliving a similar nightmare again courtesy of relatives, friends and even strangers who have no personal experience of kidney disease. Rather, they have heard of a friend or friend of a friend whom the doctor said had to go for dialysis. These friends of theirs tried some simple remedies and voila! when they went for the next medical consultation, the doctor was impressed with the recovery of the renal function and dialysis was not necessary anymore.
Some of the plants for these remedies can be found in home gardens, like the Sabah snake grass and moringa, which are easily cultivated and grow prolifically. Another plant is the petai belalang, which can be found in abundance in secondary forests and neglected lands. They are all believed to have curative powers beneficial for kidney problems.
“No harm done trying them,” a friend told me after he found out about my condition. “If you don’t try, you’ll not know if it they work or not.”
His advice and suggestions could do more harm than good. He had no idea how kidneys function and what caused the problem. All he knew was what he heard from someone who knew of someone else getting better after taking those things.
I listened to him with many pinches of salt and told him I will think about it when I actually had no intention of considering it. I was not going to leave the fate of my kidneys to trial and error because it could be fatal. There are simply not enough clinical trial results to convince me those remedies work. Otherwise, we will not be reading reports of the increasing number of people suffering from chronic kidney disease in the country. If only it was that simple.
Sometimes, it is difficult to decline such suggestions politely. This friend of mine was very persistent. He would call and nag as if his life depended on it. There was one time it got so bad that I decided to ignore all messages and phone calls from him to just get some peace of mind. I figured that if he decided to break the friendship because of that, I would not shed a tear over it. Fortunately, he got the message and backed off. Our friendship never fully recovered after that.
The different nephrologists I’ve consulted told me chronic kidney disease cannot be reversed and I am inclined to believe these medical professionals more than hearsay. The information they imparted to me has been substantiated by evidence-based research, which they have spent a good part of their lives studying, observing and treating.
My body and my health are my own responsibility. If I were so careless as to accept and use folk remedies and alternative therapies, ultimately I will be the one who suffers the consequences should these treatments go awry. This is my life we were talking about and I am not about to go on a wild goose chase based on unqualified suggestions.
I was a first-hand witness of such recklessness many years ago. An immediate family member, who was diagnosed with advanced nasopharyngeal cancer, decided against better judgement to delay radiotherapy as recommended by the doctor, and took herbal medicine prescribed by a Chinese physician who came highly recommended by a relative.
Her condition got worse. She went back to the doctor who immediately got her admitted. She passed away even before she could begin radiotherapy. She may or may not have survived with mainstream medical treatments but at least the doctors who were looking after her were specialists in treating her disease. What qualifications do these Chinese physicians have in this field? I have since stopped trusting and listening to people who have bright ideas like this, especially when it comes to lifethreatening diseases.
Even when I meet people with similar conditions as mine, I’ve made it a point not to impose what I do upon them. Our conditions may be similar but only the doctor knows what kind of treatment is best for each individual. I am always more than willing to share my experience but I always advise them to consult their doctor first before anything else.
People should be more mindful and responsible when dishing out unsolicited advice, no matter how well meant it was supposed to be. The only advice one should give for people for the treatment of any disease is to strictly follow the doctor’s orders. The spirit of wanting to help is noble. But we should not do it beyond our capabilities and understanding.