Doc on why Gen Y unable to handle stress
We have found that many from this generation lack the ability to handle stress, not used to experiencing failures, and have been overprotected by their parents from the time they were infants up till graduation from college.
BINTULU: The inability to handle stress among members of Generation Y, or the ‘Millennials’, could be attributed to the environment that they were in when growing up.
Generation Y refers to those born between late 1970s and late 1990s.
According to Bintulu Hospital director Dr Davis Johnraj, this generation is of those who ‘grew up surrounded by high-technology gadgets’.
“We have found that many from this generation lack the ability to handle stress, not used to experiencing failures, and have been over-protected by their parents from the time they were infants up till graduation from college. As a result, upon entering the workforce, they suddenly realise that they are on their own – rendering them unable to handle even the slightest bit of stress.
“About 10 per cent of our doctors resigned within the first few months after reporting for duty because many simply could not handle the stress,” he disclosed during a ‘Parenting 3.0’ seminar at a hotel here recently.
The organiser was Bintulu Hospital Psychiatric Services Welfare Association, which collaborated with the hospital’s Department of Psychiatry and Mental Health, as well as its Occupational Therapy Unit in running the event, which was aimed at discussing current issues in parenting.
Adding on, Dr Davis said as a parent himself, he called upon fellow parents to figure out the best way to deal with children, in that each child is different.
He quoted one saying to describe this scenario: ‘Getting married without adequate preparation is like jumping into the water without learning how to swim’.
“As parents, we are constantly learning, as none of us are perfect and unfortunately, we live in an imperfect world, with imperfect children.
“However, we must do our best so that they (children) would grow up having confidence in themselves.
“I also believe that parenting without adequate preparation is a great challenge and in this current generation, raising children is not as easy as it probably was in past generations. Still, we need to prepare ourselves for this demanding responsibility – mentally, physically and emotionally,” he said.
On a related issue, Dr Davis
Dr Davis Johnraj, Bintulu Hospital director
disclosed that this division recorded the number of highest teenage pregnancy cases, involving those aged 14 to 15.
“It’s like a child taking care of another child – it’s a different environment, awkward even, for that child.”
Dr Davis also noted that children are growing up nowadays with all the facilities in the world — some even receive tablet computers as birthday presents when they turn two years old.
Back on parenting, he said there is a lot of pressure being put on children to perform.
“My second daughter is going to Primary 1. In the first week of school, my wife already heard from other mothers that they needed to sign their children up for tuitions.
“Even in Primary 1, the pressure has been put on the children to perform, for them to get all As – without understanding that everybody is gifted in different areas.”
In this respect, he advised parents to stop putting too much stress on themselves and the children.
The most important role that parents could play, he stressed, would be to ensure that they would spend adequate time with their children. He then related an incident that exemplified this.
“A private school teacher told me that once, a 10-year- old boy came to him one day and gave him RM1,000, saying that this was for the teacher to talk with the boy for one hour.
“Realising that there was something wrong, the teacher called the father who surprisingly, verified what the boy said – the father simply did not have enough time to spend with his son as he was always travelling.
“People nowadays are so busy that they want the teachers to take care of their children at school. Some children were raised by maids – with no affection from their parents, many of them turned into very bitter grown-ups.
“How are we going to train them if we don’t show good examples; if every time we drive, we break traffic rules? It’s as if telling the children that it’s fi ne to break the rules,” he stressed.
Dr Davis said attending parenting seminars and other relevant courses would be among the most viable ways for parents, especially the younger couples, to enhance their parenting skills and understanding the things involved in raising their children.
“Nobody can say they are the perfect parents – we are always learning. As such, I hope that this (seminar) could become a learning point for all of you.”
The seminar gathered more than 100 participants comprising young parents and educators.
The facilitators were Datin Dr Fauzi Ismail – a retired consultant for child and adolescent psychiatry under the Health Ministry, and Hospital Columbia Asia-Bintulu paediatrician consultant Dr Smrdhi Sarachandran.
Dr Smrdhi kicked off the discussions through the presentation on ‘Kids and Gadgets: Development or Disaster?’, followed by Dr Fauzi who talked about ‘Surviving Your Teenagers: Parenting Adolescents’ and ‘Why Don’t Kids Tell? Detecting Bullying and Sexual Abuse’.