A dad they can count on
One plus one equals two bundles of joy for this accountant.
GRINNING from ear to ear, I watched with much pride as my five-year-old daughter performed at her school’s annual concert. Since when did she grow out of her diapers and get into this beautifully tailored costume for the Little Ancient China dance she enjoyed so much?
It was a dance she had been diligently practising day and night – at school during the day, and at home after. She had been patiently awaiting my return from work every night to be her dance partner. “1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 ... 2, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 ...,” she’d chant like a professional choreographer, while instructing me to strictly follow the steps. Sure, her dad plays soccer like a pro, but when it comes to dancing, she doesn’t know that dear dad has two left feet.
Everything seemed to have happened so swiftly. I remember holding her for the first time in my hands on the afternoon of Boxing Day in 2006, as my thoughts went round the world seven times and came back with 1,001 unanswered questions. “I am now a father of two beautiful girls,” I thought, and reassured myself that everything would be fine, just like the years that went by while raising our elder daughter.
Given that children grow at an alarmingly rapid rate, I began thinking long and hard about my daughters’ future. Of course I am one of those Asian parents who’d want their children to become a doctor, lawyer or engineer. Or at least an accountant like me. I’ll surely impart all the knowledge I have to make one, or better still, both of them, accomplished accountants with a string of qualifications behind their names.
Oh, this is but the rosy path I’d love to see them happily trot on in future. And I’ll always be there for them when they start building their dream career, whatever it may be, as long as it doesn’t deviate too much from that as a doctor, lawyer or engineer.
“A baby doctor,” the little one will exclaim, whenever I ask her what she wants to be when she grows up. That’s a paediatrician, I believe. The elder sister, knowing her responsibility to continue dad’s legacy, will dutifully answer: “Accountant aje-lah (Just an accountant),” much to my joy, albeit a short-lived one, because kids can change their ambitions several times a day. Lately, the younger one has started to show an interest in the outer space. “I want to be asteronot (astronaut).”
Their antics never fail to make me smile after a long, hard day at work.
Will there be sibling rivalry? How on earth am I going to cope with them? These questions were answered the moment we brought the little one home, some five years ago. The first-born seemed to be completely envious of her little sister who got new clothes and hampers from well-wishers and visitors. We had to skilfully put away the gifts before she laid eyes on them. She was, after all, a threeyear-old who lacked the ability to understand the concept of sharing or give-and-take.
I was at my wits’ end trying to reason with her. “Don’t take other people’s belongings” or more commonly, “Share, she’s your sister.” When all else failed, there was always the “I’m going to pack all your things and give them away” warning. That worked. Almost always.
Fast forward to 2012, and I feel a sense of pride seeing my children becoming the best of friends. The elder has grown to be a very responsible child, often guiding her sister in her kindergarten work or when playing a board game the younger one is unfamiliar with. I can’t help but admire her willingness to give in to her little sister’s sometimes demanding ways. She clapped the loudest when her sister came on stage, cheering and encouraging her on.
The younger girl stole a few glances at us, and happily danced to the tune, despite being in school for just about two months. She is capable of adapting to any situation.
Indeed, being a parent is the best way to learn about patience and perseverance, and I am happy to see the rewards during my children’s growing up years.
I admit I can be a little stern at times, because there’s just no compromise when it comes to life’s important lessons like being respectful, honest, diligent, generous and humble.
At other times, I’m a pretty easy-going dad and they love every second of my company, especially since I am always there after work roughhousing with them. That’s a dad’s speciality after all! n Fathers Figure invites fathers of any age and every stripe – rich dad, poor dad, single father, fun dad, tiger dad – to talk about their parenting experiences. E-mail us at star2@thestar.com. my with the subject header ‘Fathers Figure’, preferably between 600 and 800 words, with a photo attached. Published contributions will be paid. So please include your full name, IC number, address and contact number.