My grounded Valentine
I MARRIED a handsome guy who is very down-toearth and maddeningly practical. So Valentine’s Day is a non-event in my household.
There will not be any candlelit dinner, unless there is a power failure. There will also not be any roses coming my way because they are expensive and, in the words of my significant other, “they cannot be eaten”. If I bawled my eyes out for roses, he might get me some chrysanthemums, the price of which remains unchanged on Feb 14.
Well, it is not in his nature to show his love through giving flowers. He loves in other ways.
A heartwarming scene in my house is hubby cooking lunch or dinner with an apron round his waist. And he always tidies up the kitchen after cooking. He grows a few types of vegetables in our garden patch so we can have fresh and insecticide-free vegetables anytime. He also has no qualms about helping to hang up the laundry.
It is also hubby’s job to take out the rubbish every night. When one of us screams “Lizard!” or “Cockroach!”, he quickly comes to our rescue with his home-made pest swapper.
He believes in giving me an angpow on my birthdays. Being shopping-impaired, he thinks it is tedious to go through the whole rigmarole of planning, choosing, buying and wrapping. If he were to buy me a gift, it is likely to be health supplements, a digital weighing scale, a twist-and-turn can opener or a keep-warm food container. He just would not buy me perfume, jewellery, accessories or cosmetics.
However, he aberrated once and I received a book of poems although he does not have any poetic genes in him. I tried to get him interested in poetry but, at best, he mutilates the poem by reading it like a menu.
I must admit that my gifts have been stereotypical. For umpteen years he has received shirts, T-shirts and socks from me. But only because he is a simple man with few wants.
This time around, he surprised me by telling me what he would like for his 58th birthday. Now that he has retired, he would like a high back swivel chair. Actually I had bought him two new T-shirts before this request. But the chair turned out to be a perfect gift because our eldest daughter bought the latest Apple computer for him. So the man is one happy retiree.
There is really no formula for a happy marriage. It takes time for two people to grow and mould into each other’s quirks and idiosyncrasies. As Oscar Wilde said: “Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.”
In my opinion, marriage is a commitment you make every day of your married life. It is saying “I do” in your heart even when his snoring rattles the glass holding his dentures with each rising crescendo.