Happily ever after
WThe writer urges everyone not to be so cynical about fairy tales. HAT are my views on fairy tales and the concept of happily ever after? I have no problem with it. The idea of two people falling in love and being happy, what’s not to like? Do I think that if I read too many of this mushy nonsense to my daughters, they will grow up idealistic and starry-eyed about love? Being idealistic is a good thing; it’s about expecting the best in life and aiming for it. I don’t see anything wrong with that.
As for starry-eyed, in case you haven’t noticed, kids are naturally optimistic and starry-eyed about everything. So it’s not like I’m instilling a quality that was nonexistent before.
Recently, an article has been circulating on Facebook about the real endings of some popular fairy tales.
Apparently, the spiel that we’ve been fed over the years has been greatly sanitised and Disney-fied. Ariel (of The Little Mermaid) finds her happy ending with Prince Eric, but the original little mermaid wasn’t so lucky. She, um, turned to foam and her prince married someone else.
In the original Rapunzel, the prince was kind of melodramatic and threw himself at some thorny bushes when he couldn’t find Rapunzel. He became blind and she had to heal him with her tears before they lived happily ever after. In the Disney version, Eugene is a common thief who is forced by Rapunzel to bring her to see the floating lanterns. During their journey, they fall in love (of course) and she also has to save him with her tears.
I’m sure a deep-thinking person somewhere would associate this salvaging love with tears thing with some modern relationship psychobabble. To me, it’s just cool that the Rapunzels, original and new, have awesome magic tears. Sometimes, reading too much into anything just kills the story. So don’t.
My girls have watched my favourite Disney fairy tale, Cinderella, countless times. I find the story of a girl who overcomes bullying and bitchiness to marry the most eligible bachelor in town very cool. Feminists would be crying foul because she has to be “rescued”, just like all the other princesses in fairy tales. I think of it not so much as being rescued but rather, of asking for help when necessary.
Are my kids disadvantaged because they’ve been fed this antifeminist rubbish? Frankly, they don’t care. They just like the dresses Cinderella wears and the most coveted of them all, those glass slippers.
The fact that Disney has given the original tales a more rosy spiel may not be such a bad thing after all. Younger kids can listen to the happy version, and when they get old enough, they can read the actual, more gory, story and decide for themselves which they prefer.
For me, I prefer the version of The Little Mermaid where she poofs and changes to foam. It’s sadder, but it’s real life. In real life, you will have to live with the consequences of your choices. If I had read that when I was 15, I would have been devastated, but 20 years of living since then has given me wisdom and insight. I think. So, thank you, Mr Disney, you gave me a happily ever after when I needed it.
Besides, if adults think kids form a perception about love and relationships from fairy tales alone, they would be sadly mistaken. Kids know they’re reading a story; sometimes they might be more adept at separating fantasy from reality than some adults out there. The point is, children learn about respect and courtesy, loyalty and kindness, tolerance and acceptance, grief and happiness, from the adults in their lives.
Whether their parents or caregivers treat each other with respect and love, or contempt and mistrust, that is what forms the little ones. So instead of spending energy and time worrying about whether Rapunzel, Ariel or Snow White are sending the right message to impressionable boys and girls, sit down and watch the show with them, and don’t think too much.
Another favourite of mine is The Princess And The Pea. When I was little, I found it unbelievable that the princess really could feel the pea beneath all those mattresses. I put a peanut under my mattress of one layer and couldn’t feel the thing, and I knew for sure peanuts were harder than peas.
I recently read a hilarious version by Laurie Young, called Princess Polly And The Pea. In it, everyone in the palace conspires to help young Polly pass the test. So they sneak in pies, harps and even a tricycle under the mattresses when the queen isn’t looking. That sure is one lumpy mattress pile! My kids love this version too. Now they’re saying if perhaps Snow White was given a pineapple, then she wouldn’t eat it, because it would be too hard to bite into.
This is why fairy tales are allowed in my house. They’re so much fun! n Elaine Dong believes in the pursuit and attainment of happiness, and that people have to work hard for the ever after. She blogs at www. angelolli.com.