Reading pleasure
When there’s no pressure, there’s pure bliss in reading with your child, as this mother discovered.
ILOVE to read. I think reading came quite easily to me because I don’t remember having a hard time when reading instruction began formally at Standard One (now Year One). We were seven years old then and were first taught to put syllables together to form words. I recall the students’ familiar chant after the teacher, “b-a ba, t-u tu, batu.” We also did a lot of tulisan, where we were taught to write upper- and lower-case letters the correct way. By the time I was eight, I was devouring Enid Blyton books. The Magic Faraway Tree and the Famous Five series still hold a special place in my heart.
I was never read to as a child, but my parents were themselves avid readers. We had books around the house and we were never deprived of them. We also frequented the local library every two weeks.
My husband’s experience with reading is a little different from mine. He lived in a small town and there were no library visits. In primary school, his reading literature consisted mostly of Doraemon and Master Q comics. While I need just four hours to finish a standard novel, he may take a few days. But, we are no different from each other in our ability to analyse, understand and appreciate literature. We both derive a great sense of pleasure from reading.
I am now a mother of three children aged eight, six and four. And how reading today has changed. Where before reading instruction started at Standard One, now children are being taught to read and write at three or four years old. Now, they are expected to be able to read, spell and write in sentences by the time they start Year One.
Oh, the pressure! Not just on parents and teachers, but on the child. Somewhere along the way, amidst phonics, flashcards, online reading games, babies’ reading programmes and such, the pleasure of reading is lost.
When my oldest child did not read independently at six, I was worried. What if she is dyslexic? And it more than pained me that she wasn’t a reader like me. It took me a while to realise that my own fear of her reading skill (or lack of) was making her fearful of reading. My unspoken expectation and the expectation of others around her caused her much stress. My thoughts about reading and when kids should start reading were dictated by what the “experts” of the day were telling me. The earlier a child starts to read, the more intelligent they are, was the implication.
I did not then view my child as an individual, with her own way of looking at and understanding the world. I saw her in comparison to other children. I thought that there was only one way to learn how to read, that is, to be taught by someone who can already read. If a child is having trouble reading, the problem lies in the child, NOT in the way the child is taught and the way reading is approached. And those were my mistakes. When I took a step back, I realised that she was doing so many things on her own that was taking her on the path of a successful reader. She loved nursery rhymes and songs, and listening to me reading aloud stories. She made up her own stories. She loved to go to the bookstore and choose her own books for me to read later. She developed a love for drawing at a very young age and as she grew, I noticed her drawings contained conversations between people. Previously, they were simple conversations with invented spelling like, “Ow, you hert me,” “Im sory” and “Wat do yu laik to eet?” Invented spelling looked worrying in the beginning but at least I knew that she understood the relationship between letters and sounds. She noticed words around her when we were at the supermarket or while I was driving, she attempted to read some of them under her breath so I couldn’t hear. I had to change my ways. Before, I chose the books I felt were appropriate for her age and made her read aloud to me every day. I became quite irritated when she lost interest quickly and complained of being tired or sleepy. I forced her to continue. Now, she chooses her own books and I read aloud to her as much as she wants me to.
Before, I sounded out sounds that I thought she didn’t know and pointed to each word as I read them, slowing down the whole reading process, making the whole story sound unnatural and reducing my daughter’s (and my) enjoyment of the story. Now, I read aloud like I would to myself, interrupted only by my daughter’s questions.
Before, I read to her when I was free or in between chores and work, making reading a chore in itself. Now, we read in bed, before bedtime, when we are both relaxed, enjoying the story and each other’s company.
Before, I was intent on reading a book word for word. Now, I realise that we can talk about the pictures in the book and it would still be like reading the words in the book. It is not the end of the world if the book does not get finished.
Before, if I was bored by the book of her choice, I’d try to get out of reading it. Now, I have learned to respect her choice of reading material and continue with reading it out loud.
Before, I would correct a wrong word or interject while she was reading to me. Now, I know to back off, to let her figure it out herself and to help only when she asks for it.
When I changed the way I approached reading, I noticed wonderful things. I saw how much she wanted to enjoy reading with me. I saw how willingly she chose books for me to read at night. I saw her confidence rising as she read words aloud without my prompting or encouragement. I saw an increase in the number of words she wrote in her drawings and the improvement in her spelling, again, without my direct instruction. I saw the pride she felt when she read on her own. I saw that when I am unwell or too tired to read to her or her siblings at bedtime, she volunteers to read to me instead.
And best of all, “I love to read, Mama!” she says to me. n Farah A. Mohd Alkaf is a speech language pathologist and a member of the Malaysian Association of Speech and Hearing. She will be conducting a Read Me A Story workshop for parents and teachers at La Salle University Hall in Petaling Jaya, Selangor, on March 24. For more info, contact Coreen Paul of JPL Training Track 013-330 1728 or e-mail coreen@trainingtrack.biz.