An Asian focus on ageing
AFTER writing a book about ageing, Dr Kanwaljit Soin has been thinking more about death. “I probably thought a bit more about death also because my late mother, who had dementia, was livi ing with me,” says the 76-year-old first time author. Her mother died last year in October at the age of 96. “It was not in a negative way, more about thinking about death as part of living and how, while we’re alive, we should not postpone thinking about it.”
Dr Soin, an orthopaedic and hand surgeon, is Singapore’s first female Nominated Member of Parliament. She is also the founding president of Wings, a nonprofit organisation that aims to help women embrace ageing, as well as one of the founding members of Association of Women for Action and Research (Aware). Her book, Silver Shades Of Grey: Memos For Successful Ageing In The 21St Century, was launched last month in Singapore. Published by World Scientific, it discusses different aspects of ageing, such as physical, emotional and mental health, philosophies and proverbs about ageing, employment, finances, sexuality, death and ageism. Married to a former High Court judge who now works as a consultant in a legal firm, Dr Soin has three sons, all in their 40s, and eight grandchildren Her widowed mother preferred to live on her own until she had dementia. Satwant Kaur moved in with Dr Soin, 'who has three younger brothers, for the last three years of her life. “My mother had a good death. I was next to her. It’s something we should all hope for, though we can’t always plan for it,” Dr Soin says.
Having a loved one with dementia can be difficult, but Dr Soin experienced some consolation as a caregiver.
“Towards the end, my mother thought I was her mother or sister. Initially, it was painful, but after a while, it didn’t matter to me. She recognised me as someone who loved her,” says Dr Soin, adding that she felt privileged to be able to care for her mother in her twilight years.
There is only a brief mention of Dr Soin’s mother’s dementia in her book, but she is also interested in its wider implications.
For instance, she cites research into how a new fondness for slapstick humour when one is older, shifting from a habitual liking for satirical humour, may be an early sign of Alzheimer’s disease.
“Whenever I’ve been in the public eye, I’ve always tried to discuss issues. Because I’m from an older generation, maybe I’m more private. I’m not even on Facebook,” she says.
She adds that ageing is not only an individual issue, but also a societal one, and advocates policy changes such as doing away with a mandatory retirement age, with many seniors ageing more healthily these days.
A “linear life course”, in which studying is followed by working life, then retirement, “doesn’t allow you to make the most of your life”, she adds.
A more “cyclical” conception would allow people to reinvent themselves by training for different careers as they grow older, as well as grant them the flexibility to, for example, have children early, before entering the workforce in their 30s.
Dr Soin has sought to bring an “Asian focus” to her book, for example, by discussing topics such as the impact of haze on older people, as well as how air pollution contributes to the risk of having a stroke.
She started writing her book in 2012, when she became more interested in the topic of ageing. She encourages readers to dip into it and not read it at one go as the richly researched book is “too dense”.
She is in good company with her late-blooming authorhood. In her book, she points out that Sophocles wrote Oedipus Rex at 68, while Frank Lloyd Wright completed the design of the famed Guggenheim Museum in New York at 80.
She writes: “It may surprise many people to find out that there are many similarities between the ageing brain and the creative brain.” – The Straits Times/Asia News Network