Queen of my heart
She doesn’t have to wear a crown to be queen, says the writer about her mother, who was an ardent fan of Queen elizabeth ii.
QUEEN Elizabeth II, who died on Sept 8 at the age of 96, was idolised by my late mother Dawn Usharani Biswas, who passed away three years ago. The Queen was held in esteem around the world as a “unifying force” and symbolised stability during decades of rapid change. She was described as a queen for all seasons.
A treasure chest of firsthand writings, insights and snapshots of the queen during key moments of her reign form a vibrant portrait of her and the extraordinary role she played.
Just like any other devoted fan, my mother could not get enough of the royal family – their memorable royal weddings, christenings, special anniversaries and birthdays.
She attentively read the heartwarming stories in the many commemorative issues that she gathered.
She even made me leave her at the MPH bookstore so that she could get the latest news of the Queen and her family members via magazines like Women’s Weekly, New Idea, People and Time. Many books in my late mother’s collection were bought at flee markets and now-defunct book stores. Those special souvenir issues contained stories of incredible events, with spectacular colour photographs, allowing my mother to relive the treasured and celebrated moments.
Queen Elizabeth’s personal style made her stand out in many memorable events. My mother followed the fashion of the 1950s, imitating the style with her cotton dresses with intricate embroidery and beading.
When my mother got married, the veil she used in her traditional Ceylonese wedding was a 13-foot lace veil, like the one designed for the queen.
Her sense of fashion and her obsession with embellishments made of pearls gave her a great sense of satisfaction.
After 51 years of marriage to my late father, my mother confided that the early years of their marriage, with its trials and tribulations, had grounded my parents in a lasting bond. When
the Queen said that her husband the Duke of Edinburgh was her “strength and stay”, her words resonated with my mother who learnt to appreciate her life partner with all his flaws.
After two weeks of mourning her husband’s passing, the Queen once again undertook official public engagements even though she was feeling great sadness.
When my father passed away in 2006, my mother – following the Queen’s example – chose to walk in the light of faith rather than languish in the darkness of fear.
Seven years later, my mother was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 84.
In the early stages of my mother’s recovery after surgery, she did not dwell on the negative effects of her treatment, which was extremely painful. Instead, just like Queen Elizabeth, she focused on the positive. My mother suppressed her anger, and trusted the oncologist and his team to provide the best treatment for her.
Her main concern was to get back into fighting form and address her condition with a strong resilience. She gleaned wisdom from the Queen’s own mother, Elizabeth Angela Marguerite Bowes-lyon, who beat cancer twice during her lifetime (she passed away at age 101). Despite facing the illness,
and being widowed, she did not shy away from the public eye.
My mother’s level of tolerance motivated many other sick and frustrated younger patients when she counselled them not to give up hope. I observed that they admired her wisdom because she was now more valued for her determination to survive. According to mother, learning to live when you feel like you are dying is an extraordinary feat, and one that she was committed to helping others accomplish. Truth be told, she not only beat cancer and its prognosis, but led a fulfilled life for another six years. Queen Elizabeth was a steady presence to millions. Her charisma and quiet, reassuring ways made her the favourite great-grandmother to many. That was also how my mother carried herself even when the surgery altered her facial features, affected her mobility and challenged her resolve to continue the good fight. I count myself fortunate as my mother’s enduring presence in my life was so inspirational and incredibly supportive. She was a symbol of courage.
My late mother had an extraordinary impact on numerous people throughout her life and survived 91 years on earth.
She will always remain the queen of my heart.