Saying ‘I do’ to love beyond borders
Union of malaysians from different races, states weave nation’s colourful tapestry
WHEN it is destined and fated, you will meet your love match no matter where you are and where they are from.
Interracial and “interstate” marriages knit an ever tighter and stronger weave in the fabric of Malaysian society. Here are their stories.
London calling
Little did Raja Hanani Raja Mushahar know that she would meet her future husband when she sat down for a meal in Malaysia Hall London, United Kingdom.
It was 1983 and the then 19-yearold from Peringgit in Melaka had unknowingly sat at the table customarily occupied by students from Sabah.
She and Sabahan Jaimin Kamin, then 22, struck up a conversation and subsequently, a friendship.
He made his interest clear by giving Raja Hanani a greeting card decorated with hearts on the corners and containing his phone number when she moved out of the place.
The couple, now aged 56 and 59 respectively, were both in the UK for further studies — she did English and he read Law.
Upon returning to Malaysia, they married in 1985 and for the first six years, Raja Hanani taught English at a secondary school in Kota Kinabalu, Sabah.
While Jaimin’s parents, who live in Kampung Kilimu, Ranau, welcomed the bride to the family with open arms, she had trouble fully comprehending what they were saying because of their thick accent.
“I was able to adapt to my students’ accent but I could not understand the Dusun accent of the elderly people, so I would just sit there and smile,” she said, adding that she had no problem conversing with Jaimin because they always spoke in English.
The couple would travel back and forth between Sabah and Melaka early in their marriage.
Jaimin is no stranger to the people of the peninsula and their speech patterns as well as their food.
“In primary school, I had been taught by teachers from the peninsula, so the language and accent were familiar to me.”
He first met Raja Hanani’s parents when he came to Kuala Lumpur to sit for his Bar examination.
She said her parents liked Jaimin because they could see that he was kind and sincere.
“He loved my mother’s cooking, which motivated her to cook even more,” she added.
Raja Hanani smiled at the memory of her younger self thinking of Sabah as a faraway place.
“This was because in those days, the newscasters on television would say ‘waktu semenanjung’ (peninsula time) and ‘waktu Sabah dan Sarawak’ (Sabah and Sarawak time).”
In Raja Hanani’s opinion, to best understand another’s culture, one has to live in that community.
The couple, parents to five