Old and vulnerable
Housing complexes and centres for the elderly in US have introduced programmes, training and policies aimed at curbing spates of bullying.
SAN FRANCISCO: The unwanted were turned away from cafeteria tables. Fistfights broke out at karaoke. Dances became breeding grounds for gossip and cruelty.
It became clear this place had a bullying problem on its hands.
What many found surprising was that the perpetrators and victims alike were all senior citizens.
Nursing homes, senior centres and housing complexes for the elderly have introduced programmes, training and policies to curb spates of bullying, an issue once thought the exclusive domain of the young.
“There’s the clique system just like everywhere else,” said Betsy Gran, who until recently was assistant director at San Francisco’s 30th Street Senior Center. “It’s like ‘Mean Girls’, but everyone is 80.”
After the cafeteria exiles and karaoke brouhahas, the 30th Street Center teamed up with a local nonprofit organisation, the Institute on Aging, to develop an antibullying programme.
All staff members received 18 hours of training that included lessons on what constitutes bullying, causes of the problem and how to manage such conflicts.
Seniors were then invited to similar classes, held in English and Spanish, teaching them to alert staff or intervene themselves if they witness bullying.
Signs and even place mats around the centre now declare it a “Bully Free Zone”.
“I think in the past I would have just stayed out of it,” said Mary Murphy, 86, a retired real estate agent who took the classes. “Now I might be inclined to help.” Robin Bonifas, a social work professor at Arizona State University and author of the book Bullying Among Older Adults: How to Recognize and Address an Unseen Epidemic, said existing studies suggest about one in five seniors encounters bullying.
She sees it as an outgrowth of frustrations characteristic in communal settings, as well as a reflection of issues unique to getting older.
Many elderly see their independence and sense of control disappear and, for some, bullying can feel like regaining some of that lost power.
“It makes them feel very out of control,” Bonifas said, “and the way they sort of get on top of things and make their name in this new world is intimidating, picking on people, gossiping.”