Taken at face value

> Though the odds of someone looking like you is one in a million, that still leaves 7,499 people to confuse facial recognition devices

Now face recognition is coming to our phones.

If you’re kidnapped and your abductors give you a black eye, your phone will lock itself and say: “You’re not my master, you lumpy-faced stranger.”

Japanese scientist Shigeomi Koshimizu got over the facial changes problem by inserting 360 hidden sensors into a seat to precisely measure your bottom.

He put the device in a car and programmed the vehicle to turn itself on if it felt that your butt was familiar.

Some scientist say butttriggered security devices are the way of the future. This seems risky, given the rising obesity rates.

“Hello, boss? I can’t come to work today as my car thinks my bottom is too big.”

One reader, businessman Karuna Menon, said he liked the idea, adding that the next time a guy’s wife asks if her butt looks big, the husband can just say: “I dunno, ask the car.”

What about those of us with common faces?

A techy friend said that Apple had calculated that the odds of someone having a face similar enough to be able to unlock your phone is literally one in a million.

That means there are 7,499 people in the world with a face exactly like mine. Poor them.

I shared this factoid with my kids, and they were typically pragmatic about it.

“If you die, Daddy, we can just get another one.”

Nury Vittachi is an Asia-based frequent traveller. Send ideas and comments to lifestyle. nury@thesundaily.com.