NICOLE TAN
instead, he was totally taken aback. “Any inhibitions prior to meeting her dad quickly dissipated and was replaced by familiarity, what more upon learning that he was a football fan too. Since then, our relationship has flourished into the father-son relationship that it is today.”
Meanwhile, Yasmin’s acceptance into his family happened gradually. Six months following his father’s passing, his mother was diagnosed with latestage breast cancer. Yasmin who had been pivotal in helping him through his dad’s passing, also helped care for his ailing mother, and it didn’t go unnoticed. “As friends and family paid visits to my mother, Yasmin became a fixture in the family, always there, always caring as the doting future daughter-in-law.”
While he was raised a Hindu and had read plenty of scriptures growing up, Livingeshan said his philosophy was pretty much simple: “kind thoughts and actions begets positivity”. When the time came to embrace Islam, he and Yasmin researched and looked for an Islamic religious class that catered to people from diverse groups. “We found an NGO which was conducting classes for new Muslims. A meeting in Starbucks in TTDI on a Friday evening with a preacher from the NGO basically sealed the deal. In our three-hour-long conversation, I was given a lifetime’s worth of information about Islam. Every question was answered and there were conciliatory notes with what I had believed all my life. From then on, I was all set for the conversion.”
Still, his journey of becoming a Muslim was far from over. With help from his former colleague Syahiran, his foundation of Islam was strengthened. “He – the bedrock upon which my learnings were based on – was always willing to listen to me and guide me throughout the process. Even though he was to leave the company shorty after, we kept in touch and our conversations helped solidify my foundations in my quest to learn about Islam.”
Having married Yasmin recently, he notes that Ramad Ramadan this year will be special as it marks the first time ever for him to fast. “I have observed over the years how Yasmin fasted, and I believe it will se serve as a helpful marker as I emba embark on this beautiful journey. I ac accept and I believe everyone would too, that there will be many false starts to my fasting journey, as is to be expected with challenges that you first
Although Nicole T Tan was fairly informed on the fu fundamentals of Islam, having been surrounded by mostly Muslim frie friends since her university days, she says converting to the re religion calls for more than knowled knowledge. “Reciting the Shahadah – the declaration of faith, demands hon honesty and has to come from the hea heart.” The recent convert who embraced the relig religion for love remembers fe feeling a sense of calm and p peace just before she recited t the allimportant declarat declaration. “It was an indescribab indescribable feeling and was an experience where w words just won’t suffice.”
A first convert in her family, Nicole did anticipate challenges especially after her conversion, since she would still be living at home. “Although my family were not very supportive at first, as time went by, I saw that they were trying their best to accommodate me whenever they could,” she shares. Her biggest challenge was mealtime at home, for example, when it comes to food, which Islam declares must be halal (kosher). “My family did not understand what is considered halal and what is not.” It was difficult for her family to also comprehend why she needed to have separate kitchen/ cooking utensils, thinking she was being a bit too extreme. Despite the continued teasing, Nicole patiently explained the basics being well aware that they have not been exposed to Islam.
Once her family understood, come mealtime, the family would dine together but Nicole would either cook or buy her own halal food.
As it turns out, she too had some misconceptions about conversion at first. What surprised her was that she did not need to change her Chinese name, which wasn’t mandatory. “Many people, including myself, have had this wrong perception, thinking that when one converts to Islam, they need to change their name. After attending a few compulsory classes, I’ve come to realise that my prior knowledge and perception about Islam is not entirely accurate.”
As for the adjustments she has had to make personally, Nicole says it hasn’t been that difficult on her part because she didn’t have to give up much. “I don’t drink and for the past two years, I’ve been eating clean (vegan diet) for health reasons.” And if it is Chinese food she craves, she says it’s not a problem in Malaysia as she can always go to a Chinese Muslim restaurant. What has required some effort is observing the everyday prayers, which compared to her previous religion (Buddhism), is relatively different. “Overall, there are practices that I need to learn and unlearn. The transition will take first for Nicole, to which she says she he is physically prepared but hopes she will be mentally prepared too. “Not consuming food for about 11 hours is not as challenging as not drinking water. But where there’s a will there’s a way.” During the interview, she said she would most likely start fasting half day for a week before Ramadan so that her body won’t go into shock, “just like how we should eat less before going into detox mode,” she adds.
Sadly, her first Raya celebration as a Muslim will be one away from home, as Nicole will be leaving to pursue her Masters abroad early in June. Although she will miss all the local buzz that comes with preparation and festivities, she says, “I wish all fellow Muslim brothers and sisters a Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri.”