Malta Pride

In my role as community manager with Allied Rainbow Communities (ARC), I have become more and more involved in media monitoring and the effect of depictions of the LGBTIQ+ community on different individuals. It is within this context that when a caricature of a seemingly effeminate gay man complaining about the price increase of the pastizz is published, someone immediately brings it to my attention. Also, on the same day, Pope Francis is quoted as having said that children struggling with their sexual orientation were advised to seek psychiatric help, which was also placed on my radar.

On the former, my first reaction is a ‘caricature is a caricature’; it is meant to exaggerate depictions of reality and instigate some sort of discomfort and ridicule a person or a situation. I let it be and continue my work. However, I soon begin to see people reacting badly to this cartoon and realise that not everyone might have the same reaction, and that not everyone is ok with it.

I take a moment to reflect on the whole situation and I understand that this does not affect me personally because I’m relatively conservative in mannerism and attire – often appearing ‘straight-looking’, as some people might call it – and, as such, have never been harassed or made fun of. But in my teenage years of struggling to accept myself as a gay man, something like that (and a figurehead like the Pope saying homosexuality is intrinsically disordered) would have anxiously led me to believe that the rest of my life would be a never-ending series of taunts and ridicule before being eventually condemned to an eternity in Hell. I recall, in fact, a close relative, in my childhood, calling a local personality on TV a ‘pooffy’ and giggling. In my personal journals, I used to write and ask God every day to end my life as I could not bear the shame and self-disgust. My idea of an adult gay man was equivalent to that of a ‘monster’. Suicidal thoughts were the order of the day and my only refuge was the pre-historic mIRC, which allowed me a channel within which to speak to other gay men online in the hope of finding people who could give me hope that it would get better.

In my youth, the internet lacked positive role models of the LGBTQ+ community, but nowadays visibility has increased significantly. Young people are finally comfortable coming out or recognising their gender identity at a much younger age. Laws have been modernised to protect and empower all individuals, irrespective of their sexual orientation and gender identity. While I am sure the LGBTQ+ community is thankful for all this progress, in reality, and in day to day life, it still doesn’t stop society adopting a negative attitude towards minorities, and does not mitigate harassment, be it subtle or overt. We are still a minority after all, and some of us face harsher realities than others. Especially if one is effeminate, identifies as trans or gender non-conforming, has a disability, is older, is living with HIV, or is bisexual or asexual, everyday interaction can be challenging. Some people struggle with mental health issues, particularly because of the oppression, rejection and exclusion they have experienced in their life. Others struggle to integrate their sexual orientation and faith, an ongoing conflict within the faith communities. People in general love black-or-white thinking, and our life just makes people frustrated because in their realm of understanding we are ‘just making it up’. Well, guess what? We are not. There are several situations in which the LGBTIQ+ community still feels less accepted because of all the diversity that comes with it. The layers of shame and the internal homophobia experienced by the struggling individual doesn’t dissipate once the person comes out, as though a switch has been flicked. Furthermore, a man who identifies as gay does not automatically make him an expert on all the other gender identities and sexual orientations. Unless the community is brought together in demonstration, friendship and dialogue, this understanding remains a mirage.

This is where I get to validate an event like the Pride March Demonstration, as well as other events during the Malta Pride Week, and stress how important they are for the LGBTIQ+ community. Pride is not about flaunting our sexualities or bodies to the crowds, as many might think. It is definitely not there to exclude heterosexual allies from celebrating with us. Pride remains a political statement first and foremost, reaffirming that we exist in all spheres of life; it is an opportunity to bring a very diverse community together and to stand in solidarity with those still living in fear, especially in those countries not far from ours, where being gay can get you jailed or killed. In fact, we are proud to say that this year we shall see organisations like MOAS, who work relentlessly to aid vulnerable groups in other parts of the world, taking part in Pride.

In the future, we hope to see Malta become a true beacon of diversity and, despite its size, making great strides in improving the lives of those in other regions.