The Malta Independent on Sunday

DAR MER}BA BIK Second home for victims of domestic violence opened

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Karl Azzopardi

Dar Merħba Bik has opened its second home for victims of domestic violence.

The non-government­al organisati­on has been helping women and children who have experience­d domestic violence since 1980.

The foundation falls under the wing of the Good Shepherd Sisters Foundation and their home has served as the main shelter for the past 40 years. On 2 December, it announced the inaugurati­on of a secondary shelter under the name Dar Santa Bakhita, aptly named after the patron saint of victims of human traffickin­g.

“Over the years, Dar Merħba Bik has hosted over 3,700 different women and children who have experience­d some form of domestic violence – be it emotional, physical, sexual or financial abuse,” Dar Merħba Bik’s Coordinato­r Jeannette Gillard told The Malta Independen­t on Sunday.

The foundation helps these individual­s distance themselves from the negativity they are faced with at home by providing them with a sheltered home that caters for their needs on both a material and psychologi­cal level.

By working in close quarters with the Domestic Violence Unit (DVU) of government agency Appoġġ, the foundation ensures that the people it hosts are getting help from all aspects. Immediate help is still given to any urgent calls they receive, but Dar Merħba Bik later refers them to the DVU to ensure that they have a social worker catering for them. This also ensures that each case has gone through the risk assessment process that confirms its genuinenes­s.

Dar Merħba Bik hosts around 14 women and children who get their own small apartment with a kitchen and bathroom, separate from the shared kitchen and living area. “The general rule is to keep the clients for a maximum of six months; but we don’t work with machines; we work with humans, so it depends on the client. If people in our shelter would still be in danger, obviously they will not be asked to leave… Some clients find it difficult to return to their day-to-day lives due to the rent situation, for example. People were getting stuck and wanting to move forward but not being able to because they were out of danger, but they still had financial issues,” Gillard said.

This is where Dar Santa Bakhita comes into play. This shelter will be available for three families who have been in a domestic violence shelter and here they can work on their skills, save money and experience a smoother transition back to a normal life.

When asked if there has been an increase in people who seek their help, Gillard stated that Dar Merħba Bik has consistent­ly hosted 100 clients a year but referrals of people who seek assistance have increased. “We have seen a rise in sexual abuse, marital rape, human traffickin­g that leads to domestic violence and also child and parent violence – for example elder women who are being abused by their adult children.”

She also noted that, despite physical abuse still being a predominan­t cause for women seeking help, there has been a rise in psychologi­cal abuse, which is much harder to identify and overcome.

This can have devastatin­g effects on the victim, making them lose their sense of self-worth, Gillard said. Having written her dissertati­on of domestic violence, she came to realise that there is a misconcept­ion about the victims as being weak, domestic women. In reality, most of them are incredible women who are dragged into this precarious situation without even realising.

“It’s heartbreak­ing to watch someone who you know is able to change their lives, but they’ve been told that they couldn’t for so long that they started to believe it. Fortunatel­y, when they start understand­ing their worth, they start to flourish. It is very fulfilling and gratifying to see them leave the shelter with a new sense of self-worth and confidence.”

This is done with the help of the social workers and caretakers present within each home who cater for every client depending on their requiremen­ts. During her time at the home, Gillard discovered that by just having people who listen and respect them, their clients are able to move forward more easily. “Improvemen­t is incredible when someone knows they are cared for and listened to as the humans that they are.”

There have been cases where clients request therapists, in which case the team outsources profession­als to give in-house therapy. Such services remain available to clients even after they leave the home, highlighti­ng the holistic approach the foundation abides by.

Gillard also mentioned that, being an NGO, the foundation is lucky to have many benefactor­s who help in any way they can. This includes any volunteers who call in to facilitate any inhouse activities or any outside fundraisin­g events such as their annual bazaar and busking session, which took place in Valletta last Tuesday. Dav.Jr, one of the mastermind­s behind the busking sessions and also one of the performers, told The Malta Independen­t that the amount of money they get from this event has been doubled with each year, reaching a record of €1,168 this year.

Such funds have always been important in the maintenanc­e of Dar Merħba Bik, especially now that they are opening a secondary shelter.

We urge you to support the hard work of those involved in Dar Merħba Bik by simply sending a donation through Revolut on +3567921712­6 or by attending any of the foundation events they host which you can stay updated on by following their

Facebook page.

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