Brothers in arms
The close bond between Prince Harry and Prince William has been evident since their childhood and, as Emma Clifton writes, it has only grown in strength throughout both the bad times and the very good.
There was never going to be any real competition for who Prince Harry was going to pick as his best man for the big day. Harry and Prince William have managed to create and protect a relationship that sees them not only as close siblings, but also close friends, no doubt in part due to the fact that nobody else can relate to the strangeness and wonder of what their lives in the royal family are like.
Born into the spotlight, they were handed a particularly loaded inheritance: their parents’ volatile marriage and divorce, their father’s adultery, their mother’s tragic death at the age of 36, just three years older than Harry is now. But it made them even closer as they teamed together through it all. Who could forget the sight of them trailing behind their mother’s coffin through the streets of London in 1997, when William was 15 years old and Harry just 12? Fourteen years later, we saw the brothers in formal wear again, but for a far happier occasion, when Harry stood next to his brother as best man on William’s wedding day, and uttered the delightful phrase caught on camera as Kate entered Westminster Chapel: “Wait till you see her.”
The brothers’ bond has been the one constant throughout the highs and lows of their very public life. In a letter to a family friend, Princess Diana wrote that William was a besotted big brother from the word go, spending his time “swamping Harry with an endless supply of hugs and kisses, hardly letting the parents near”. Her letters also gave
an indication of the difference between the brothers’ behaviour, stating that Harry was always the one “constantly in trouble” when they went to boarding school. But the labels of Sensible William and Cheeky Harry were put aside after the death of their mother, which forced the boys to grow up overnight.
“Our relationship is closer than it’s been because of the situation we’ve been through,” William says. “Losing our mother at a young age, it’s helped us travel through that difficult patch together.
“That’s the thing about being a best mate, inevitably one of you is sometimes on an up, while the other is on a down. You’re always there for each other and repaying that favour.”
Rough patch
Harry has relied on his big brother when times have got tough. Their mother, Princess Diana, was open about her mental health battles at a time when there was still great stigma around such topics. It’s a cause that her two sons have embraced, creating the charity Heads Together to raise awareness and find treatment for mental health issues in young people, the homeless and military veterans.
Harry himself went through a rough patch in his late 20s – he describes it as “two years of chaos” – which included the naked photos in Vegas that surfaced in 2012. “I can safely say that losing my mum at the age of 12, and therefore shutting down all of my emotions for the last 20 years, has had a quite serious effect on not only my personal life but my work as well,” Harry says. “I have probably been very close to a complete breakdown on numerous occasions when all sorts of grief and sort of lies and misconceptions and everything are coming to you from every angle.”
He confided in William, who urged him to seek help. “My brother, you know, bless him, he was a huge support to me. He said, ‘Look, you really need to deal with this. It is not normal to think that nothing has affected you.’”
When it comes to forging their own roles in the royal family, the brothers have been heavily influenced by both their parents. William and Harry followed their father into the British armed forces, with William joining the Royal Air Force and Harry enlisting with the British Army, participating in top-secret combat missions in Afghanistan. But it’s their mother’s legacy they most seek to replicate. Just as she was The People’s Princess, her sons have shown the same ability to connect with everyone they meet when on their royal duties. Harry’s creation of The Invictus Games, for injured or wounded veterans, has been particularly therapeutic for him.
Life partners
With such a tight-knit bond, it would take a very special woman – or two! – to join their inner circle. Harry was a huge fan of Kate Middleton from day one, calling her the “big sister I never had”, and William and Kate have in turn welcomed Meghan with open arms. Both couples live at Kensington Palace – Harry and Meghan in the modest, two-bedroom Nottingham Cottage, and William, Kate and their three children in the much larger Apartment 1A. Reports suggest that the adjacent apartment, which boasts a not-to-be-sneezed-at 21 bedrooms, is undergoing renovation so the newlyweds can upgrade to a more family friendly residence.
Now both adults, and husbands, the brothers have managed the tricky balance of staying the best of friends and also finding partners who get along. Whether deliberate or not, Harry and William have created a very different, very warm royal family – and it’s their lasting friendship that has stood the greatest test of time.