Cricket Report

TESTING THE THEORY

I decided that I wanted to test the theory of ‘‘use it or lose it’’. First step was to bribe the Planks selector Laurie Bradly to ensure that I was picked in the Planks XI to play Te Awamutu Rosetown Rogues at the Kihikihi Domain on March 11. Having planked for 25 years, I needed to test the theory in my only appearance for the 2017-18 season. At the end of the match I can confidently opine that the theory is false - because having not used it I have not lost it. You see cricket is a simple game requiring a limited number of skills.

See the ball - two cataract operations help. Hit the ball - good bowlers aim at your bat. Bowl the ball - I can do that better than my 5 year old grandson (just). Field the ball - lying prostrate on the ground is effective. Catch the ball - just like catching a bus using my Gold Card. Throw the ball - I can throw a ball ( but not as far as Tom Walsh can put the shot). Run - but so can my nose. Sledge - but not as good as Davey Warner

As for the match, the Planks were the victors scoring 196 and then dismissing the Rogues for 75 in their 23rd over.

Significant batting contributions came from the Planks top order with Darren Mordecai, Garth Littlejohn and Tony Giles all retiring on 30.

In the bowling department, 5 wickets shared between Littlejohn and Grant Wood in the space of 6 balls significantly contributed to the Rogues’ loss. On reflection, perhaps the Planks handled the drink breaks of gin and tonic better than the Rogues.

-Don Shirley