Herald on Sunday

THERE'S A WORLD OUT THERE — GRAB IT

Travelling by yourself doesn’t have to be a daunting prospect, writes

- Stephanie Holmes.

Ioften wonder how different my life would have been if I hadn’t made the decision in my early 20s to fill a backpack, leave my hometown of Cambridge, England, and set off around the world by myself.

I’d always wanted to travel, but the thought of doing it solo was intimidati­ng. I knew I’d have a great time if my best friend and I went together. But she wasn’t ready — she had a job and a boyfriend — and so I waited a bit longer, until the time was right. But after some significan­t life events, I realised I couldn’t wait any more. Travel was my dream and I couldn’t wait for someone else to give me permission to pursue it.

And so off I went. First, a three-week small group tour of Malaysia, a taster to see if I would be happy hanging out with strangers in foreign lands.

Surprise, surprise, I was, and three months after landing back in the UK, I booked a round the world ticket, packed my bag again, and set off for what I knew would be a year of happy adventures.

I never intended to still be in New Zealand, more than 15 years later, having made it my home. But travel is funny like that; no matter how much planning you put in, you never know quite what’s awaiting when you arrive in each new destinatio­n.

And isn’t that the beauty of it?

You don’t have to head off around the world for a year — or 15 — to experience the joy of solo travel. Even a week away by yourself will be richly rewarding. Take inspiratio­n from these tips and find your own way in the universe. It’s really not as scary as you think.

Start small

First try out a short trip, somewhere not too dissimilar to home, to see if you like travelling by yourself. Better to do it this way than book a year-long round-the-world solo adventure and realise, a month into it, that you hate being alone. If you have a partner or a preferred travel buddy, you can still enjoy the pleasures of a solo trip. Is there a place you’re longing to go that your partner or friends just don’t fancy? Don’t push pause on your life, just because you don’t have a plus one. You deserve to fulfill your own travel destiny.

Choose your destinatio­n

For your first solo trip, play to your strengths. If you want to be sociable and make new friends while you’re away, choose a destinatio­n where the locals are going to speak your language. That doesn’t mean you have to limit yourself to Australia or the US — there are so many places where English is widely spoken, including Hong Kong, Singapore, the Philippine­s, Malaysia, Israel, and much of Europe.

Find the right accommodat­ion

A luxury hotel may seem like the dream, but hotels can be quite lonely when travelling by yourself — you’re unlikely to strike up a conversati­on with someone in the same way as you would at a hostel. The latter doesn’t have to mean a rickety bunk in a giant dorm — the quality of hostels has risen in recent years and a private room with en suite can give you the best of both worlds. You get your own space to retreat to when needed, but also the option of shared facilities, like communal lounges, kitchens and TV rooms, where you can strike up conversati­ons with other travellers.

Airbnb allows you to book a room in a host’s home, which gives you a ready-made buddy to talk to and someone to give you expert tips for navigating the local area. Just be sure to delve deeply into the user reviews before you book, so you know exactly what to expect — and what the host might be expecting of you.

Make plans . .

Having some arrangemen­ts in place will help you feel more relaxed when you start your trip. Research what your arrival airport is like and what the transport options are; work out where your accommodat­ion is in relation to public transport; download some offline maps to your phone; save phone numbers of hotels/hosts/tour companies/consulates etc, and make back-ups in case you lose your phone.

The internet is a traveller’s friend. No matter where you’re going, someone is likely to have been there before you . . . and more often than not, written about their experience­s on some kind of forum. Read up about others' experience­s to get some kind of feel for your destinatio­n and any pitfalls to be wary of.

Make sure you share your plans with a trusted friend, family member or colleague. Give them an itinerary (even if it’s rough notes you’ve put together yourself) on where you’ll be, on what dates, and any contact numbers that may help in an emergency (hotels, airlines, embassies etc).

There are also the little things to think of — like who’s going to apply sunscreen to your back when you’re at the beach, or watch your bag while you go for a swim? These things are annoying, yes, but not insurmount­able. Aerosol sunscreen sprays are great for getting to those hard-to-reach areas, and if you leave all valuables in your room/storage locker you can swim carefree.

. . but make them flexible

You know how I just told you to read internet forums? Well, yes, you should, but don’t take them as gospel. Online reviews and comments should always be taken with a pinch of salt — they’re subjective, and written by people who could be very different from you, who were expecting very different things from their holiday experience. Trust your instincts.

Also be prepared to change plans when necessary. Delays, lost luggage and other frustratio­ns unfortunat­ely do happen sometimes and although it’s more stressful when you have to deal with it by yourself, the key is to try to keep a sense of humour and be adaptable.

Put yourself out there

Talking to strangers is intimidati­ng, no matter how old or popular you are. I always feel like an 8-year-old trying to make new friends in the playground when I first approach new people on a solo trip. But it can be the key to staving

off loneliness — or simply a good way to get recommenda­tions for things to do/see/eat.

Another tip is to check out Facebook community groups and local event pages for your destinatio­n to find fun activities suited to what you like. A quick scan of Awesome Events

NYC, for example, shows that tomorrow there’s a Fall Out Boy concert at SummerStag­e in Central Park, a Brazilian Block Party in the Lower East Side and a Bubble Party in Washington Square Park. All are free and open to everyone.

Take a tour

If all this sounds like a lot of scary, hard work, there are ways to travel solo without having to do all the planning yourself. Small group touring, although not for everyone, is often a good option for lone travellers. You’ll have a guide or travel director taking care of all the intricate details, so you just get to sit back and have fun. You’ll also meet like-minded people, and have a ready-made group of travel buddies. Different companies have different options of itinerarie­s, group size and how much — or how little — is included. Some will charge single supplement­s if you don’t want to share a room. But the demand is growing for non-romantic tours for singles. Intrepid Travel, who say 50 per cent of their guests are travelling alone, this year launched a range of itinerarie­s just for Solo Travellers, taking in destinatio­ns from Peru to Vietnam to Morocco.

If you don’t want to commit to a whole tour itinerary, Airbnb now has an Experience­s platform, where you can book things like cooking classes, yoga workshops, photograph­y tours and much more, all hosted by a local. They’re a great way of getting you to the heart of a destinatio­n that you might not find by yourself.

Make sure you share your plans with a trusted friend, family member or colleague.

Besafe...

The general rule is don’t do anything you wouldn’t do at home. Do some research and make sure you know the whereabout­s of the less-desirable neighbourh­oods and areas. Don’t walk alone in them after dark — ride-sharing apps like Uber and Lyft are widely available in many destinatio­ns. The benefit over normal taxis is you have a record of who your driver is and can alert someone else of your journey while it’s taking place. Although smartphone­s are an invaluable asset to the solo traveller — giving access to maps, informatio­n, and endless entertainm­ent — don’t let your phone prevent you from being aware of your surroundin­gs.

When you are walking alone in an unfamiliar destinatio­n, try to exude confidence (even if that’s the last thing you’re feeling). If you look like you belong somewhere, you’re less likely to attract unwanted attention.

And, of course, the golden rule is to always get travel insurance. Yes, it’s an added expense to your budget, but it’s invaluable in the unlikely event that things do go wrong.

. . but don’t be afraid

Telling your friends/co-workers that you’re heading off by yourself can often make you doubt your travel plans. Someone will always have a horror story about a friend of a friend who travelled by themselves and ended up regretting it. But, you know what? They’re not you and you’re awesome. You can do this. Plus, you bought travel insurance so you’re already one step ahead of the game.

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