Anxiety among children on rise

"Kids start to get quite anxious, some kids are selfharming, some kids are really quite scared to be going back to school." Lesley Butler, What's Up helpline

Children increasingly struggle with anxiety, and the start of school is when floods of calls pour in to a national helpline.

School holidays and the start of school are the busiest times for the What’s Up service that offers phone and online counselling for teens and primary school children, team leader Lesley Butler says.

‘‘We take 300 to 400 more calls in school holidays per week. After Christmas they are thinking about what it’s going to be like when they get back to school.

‘‘Kids start to get quite anxious, some kids are self-harming, some kids are really quite scared to be going back to school.’’

Common fears include not having friends, if the teacher will be kind, if they will cope with the work, and bullying.

Some children were isolated from friends during holidays, especially in rural areas, so come back on a social low, she said.

The issues may seem minor to adults, but for a child they could seem huge. Butler said talking helped.

What’s Up counsellors suggest proactive strategies. However it was vital parents make time to talk with children about going back to school.

One Manawatu mum said the start of each term leaves her 11-year-old under a dark cloud.

Manawatu Standard has not identified them because of fears of continued bullying.

‘‘She’ll just break into tears, she’ll get agitated. She doesn’t want to talk about school.’’

‘‘She has trouble sleeping, she’ll still be awake at 2am because it’s constantly ticking away in her head.’’

Her daughter is now socially defensive, which made it harder to make friends, she said.

‘‘It’s scary, the effect it has. I’m constantly worrying.’’

Talking to teachers helped, as they had chosen her daughter’s class carefully this year.

The mother worried anxiety increased as children’s social skills and empathy were stunted by time spent on digital devices.

‘‘It used to be that when I was a kid, mum would tell us to go outside and there’d always be five kids out there you could play with.

‘‘Now, even if I tell her to go outside and play there’s no other children out there.’’

Senior clinical psychologist Dr Kirsty Ross said anxiety levels among children had increased.

There was also better recognition of the signs, wider acceptance some children needed help, and children were more aware of support such as What’s Up.

‘‘[In general] we are seeing younger and younger children who are needing higher levels of input in terms of mental health services.’’

Children don’t always have the emotional experience to realise what triggers their reactions, Ross said.

Signs could include challenging behaviour, crying, not wanting to eat, tummy aches or trouble sleeping.

By talking things over, adults could guide children to be more aware of their feelings, and help with perspective. Most children go through a short adjustment period at the start of the year, but soon settle in, she said.

‘‘They can forget that they did enjoy school, and that they did make friends last year. When kids are in a heightened sense of emotion it’s quite hard to remember.’’

Families still concerned significant anxiety was ongoing should talk to their GP, who could direct them to a range of other services if needed.