The Rural Games widened our scope for quirky sports

Only Scots who had something against English power poles would have come up with tossing the caber while kilted.

So now we know what free range eggs are.

They are eggs that hurtle through the air from the hands of people such as cricketers Jacob Oram and Bevan Small for a distance of about 50 metres.

And a good egg was not an amiable chap, but an egg caught intact by fellow Manawatu cricketers Dane Cleaver and David Meiring.

All four were prominent on the egg-throwing range in The Square as part of the rather quirky NZ Rural Games.

A Kairanga chook when she laid her egg would never have imagined it would end up as a projectile. The New Zealand record is 70 metres.

I have seen and dismissed some weird sports in my times, such as underwater hockey and ultimate frisbee, so wasn’t sure what a Rural Games would be all about.

The most oddball was olivestone spitting and at one stage I was asked to watch my back because I was in danger of being whacked by a cowpat.

There isn’t a national cowdung hurling association, but there is a NZ Boot Throwing Association.

Shot-putter Valerie Adams is one big unit, so they had to find the biggest knee-length gumboots for her to heave, otherwise someone over in the library having a quiet read might have worn a Skellerup.

And only Scots who had something against English power poles would have come up with tossing the caber while kilted. Chiropractors must love those guys.

But it was the sheep dog trials that drew the biggest crowds, aside from the Running of the Wools in Feilding on Friday.

The silent, strong-eyed heading dogs are always fascinating working bemused wethers, especially for townies who fondly remember the popular TV programmes A Dog’s Show and Tux Wonder Dogs.

When two big huntaways opened up with their barking, they would have drowned out the library inhabitants.

When they staged the Running of the Wools in Queenstown, they had slow, wrinkly merinos who pretty much refused to break into a trot. And Queenstown turned out to be too touristy and hoity-toity for the Rural Games.

Hence they came to Palmerston North and the good oil is, they will be here for the next three years.

They had a budget of about $900,000, were backed by all the neighbouring local bodies and big rural companies, and The Square was an ideal venue to bring country to town. The drizzle benefited local cafes because spectators took shelter there.

NZ Open anticlimax

The vistas from the NZ Open golf at Queenstown were magnificent, but disappointing the playoff was on a par-3 hole.

All right, the gallery was sipping pinot noirs on that hole, but considering it was an island green, there was a strong chance of the ball getting wet.

So when Ben Campbell and Brad Kennedy hit the drink, the playoff was an anticlimax, over after just one shot each.

They easily could have used the par-5 17th to give everyone a fair go.

Campbell also lost his NZPGA playoff in Manawatu the previous Sunday when his birdie putt was 1cm askew.

Campbell, from Masterton, was based at Manawatu last year when coached by club pro Andre White and is now in Queenstown.

Ruggered ruminations

Isn’t Manawatu’s Hurricane Ngani Laumape the best second five-eighth going around in New Zealand just now? It would be the Turbos’ luck, after losing injured Jason Emery for the season, to have Laumape called up for higher duties.

Does anyone on the planet have more dreadful hair than Highlanders flanker Elliot Dixon?

Where have all the beanpole locks gone? I popped into the Spillane Cup national Marist tournament at the Arena and every team that came out looked like a league team – all the same height. At the Spillane, I also saw a rarity – a Marist St Pat’s back tackled someone around the ankles.

Everyone of a Manawatu hue has their heart in their mouth whenever our Nehe Milnerskudder goes into a tackle, but now he looks worryingly fragile. They should put him in mothballs and bring him out for the All Blacks against those dreadful Lions.

Oscars raw deal

Film buffs tell me they can’t wait for Focal Point Cinemas to set up in Cuba St, a location predicted in this column many months back.

Focal Point should make a killing by screening the many movies Event Cinemas isn’t bringing to Palmerston North.

I understand Oscar nominees Manchester by the Sea and Fences aren’t coming to Event Cinemas in the city.

Jackie had just two fleeting screenings and was gone.

The void left by the closing of Cinema Gold has been huge, as expected.