Families belatedly get ashes

Wanganui man Mike O’kane was ‘‘gobsmacked’’ when he received a phone call about his grandmother’s remains – 25 years after she died.

Her cremated boxed ashes were one of 100 containers left at a Timaru funeral home over the years that have been identified and repatriated with family.

Only one box of remains was yet to have descendants found while four others had been contacted but they had not decided what they wanted done with them.

Funeral director Shelly Wilson became full shareholder of the Aoraki Funeral Home three years ago and discovered a backlog of cremated remains left behind by previous owners from 1952 to 2014.

Her sister, hobby genealogist Joy Pearson, offered to help and so the research began on October 2016. The labels on the old boxes were hard to decipher; some were misspelt and others were misdated.

Some ashes were left until a spouse passed so they could be interred together.

‘‘It’s been quite a long haul but very rewarding and families have been appreciative,’’ Pearson said.

O’kane had been tracked down through a number of coincidences when Pearson was making her way through a surname in the Dunedin phone book.

In a surprising twist one of those she called had a friend from university with the same surname though they were unrelated. They knew the other person had a greatgrandmother who fitted the little information the genealogist had, hence O’kane was found through his daughter.

‘‘That was an unusual one. I am taking the ashes to Whanganui for them,’’ Pearson said.

O’kane’s grandmother Esther O’kane lived in Waimate and saw in her 100th birthday before she died. He still has the telegram from the Queen congratulating her on her centenary.

‘‘Everyone thought someone else was looking after her ashes. I was a bit gobsmacked when Joy rang about three weeks ago,’’ O’kane said.

Wilson said people often mistakenly assumed if their loved ones remains were cremated they would automatically be scattered at the crematorium gardens.

‘‘There is another step; they need to make a decision or the ashes are returned to the funeral home.

‘‘We have given most back to their families and about six have asked us to scatter them on their behalf,’’ Wilson said.

To ensure any future descendants of the deceased know exactly where the ashes are, Wilson has kept meticulous records of locations were ashes have been scattered and taken a picture of the view from their resting site. She also has obtained written authorisation from family.

‘‘Now everything is on computer it’s easy to keep up.’’

Though the home would continue to care for remains at the family’s request, at least now clear records would ensure they would not be forgotten.

The O’kanes plan to bury Esther’s ashes next to her late son, Mike’s father, at the Wanganui cemetery.