Fastest BMW ever... is a limo
are different in each. For the record, the M760li’s V12 powerplant is designed to be more lively than that in the Rolls-royce Wraith, although it has less power (same torque output, though).
Still, seldom is such extreme performance delivered in such a serene manner. That’s partly because V12 performance is characteristically elastic anyway, but also because the big-7 has been calibrated to deliver its acceleration with as much dignity as possible. There’s not a lot of noise and fury, although the scenery does go blurry very suddenly.
It’s not exactly a track-day car. That would be silly. There’s no steering feel to speak of, but the mechanical grip is immense and the M760LI can be astonishingly agile on Kiwi backroads thanks to its four-wheel steering system. This is an old trick that’s finding new application in super-luxury cars; the similarly enormous Porsche Panamera can perform similar gymnastics when equipped with rear-steer.
A flagship 7-series needs to serve equally well as a luxury express, of course. The M Performance package does entail some compromise on Kiwi roads: those big tyres can tramline on our bumpy highways and they generate a lot of road noise on coarse chip. Previous experience with these kinds of cars leaves me in no doubt that the M760LI would be smooth and serene on many European roads, but some of our blacktop may test your patience. Especially when the rest of the car is so quiet.
And yes, the M760LI is astonishingly luxurious. Somebody at my house declared it preferable to a Rolls-royce Ghost for city commuting, but then he’s 11 and has M-badge-blindness.
This Seven is exquisitely wellfinished, with acres of leather but also ooh-and-aah detail touches like ceramic switchgear and nightclub-like mood lighting. The business class-style rear seating package has dual screens driven by a removable Android tablet, and individually reclining chairs that offer everything from massage function to an exercise programme that encourages you to stretch and test your muscles, using the seat-motors as resistance.
Should you wish to relax as your driver pilots the M760LI towards Monaco (or perhaps Murchison), the left-side rear passenger can power the front seat forward for the ultimate in legroom, and enjoy a fold-down footrest.
You can tone the M760LI right down with the no-cost-option Excellence model, which ditches the M warpaint for a traditional luxury-car look and feel. Same outrageous performance, but would you really? The perverse nature of BMW’S first-ever M Performance 7-series is a big part of the appeal, so it seems natural to want the show as well as the go.
But yes, the M760LI is still a shock to the system for us Kiwis. The 7-series is a rare sight in NZ, and when it does appear it’s usually in thrifty Government Crown-fleet form.
What’s the point of this weird excess? Well, the rich are getting richer and rival cars like the Audi S8 and (especially) Mercedes-amg S 63 prove that there are a loyal bunch of global buyers who want oxymoronic models that combine limousine quality with big-name high-performance credentials.
BMW has never quite had a 7-series that delivers on both counts. Now it has.