Back in the game: Bullied boy hits the field
An 11-year-old boy who endured sideline abuse over his size and weight during a league match two years ago is ready to return to the game he loves.
Eljae Pukeiti-mara is on the look out for a club in Manawatu¯ , keen to prove he deserves to play just as much as any other kid.
When Eljae lived in Auckland and played for the Manurewa Marlins, he was criticised by parents of his own team-mates who called him ‘‘big boy’’ during a junior match in 2016. His mother, Rochelle Mara, was rocked by the comments and took to social media to vent her frustrations. The Facebook post gained more than 140,000 likes and 17,000 comments.
‘‘As a parent, the incident hit me harder than it did Eljae,’’ she said.
‘‘I was often bullied as a child so to have to witness my own child face these same issues was heartbreaking. The fact that these comments came from adults was even worse.’’
After the incident in 2016, Eljae’s confidence took a hit. He would try to withdraw from school activities, such as camp, and became very shy, Mara said.
‘‘I don’t think people realise how much of an effect even the smallest comments have, especially on our kids.’’
Almost two years later, Mara still received messages from parents around the world telling her about their own children and the battles they were facing, similar to Eljae’s.
‘‘I still strongly believe some parents put an unfair amount of pressure on children to perform instead of allowing them to just play the game and enjoy it and because of this, the atmosphere around sporting events just isn’t the same.’’
Eljae stepped away from the game following the 2016 season and he and mother Rochelle moved to
Palmerston North.
Now settled in his new city, Eljae said he was ready to return to the field.
Kia Ora Warriors chairman Peter Butler, who also coaches the club’s juniors, said they would welcome Eljae back to the sport. The club focused closely on teamwork and development, and there hasn’t been much trouble with bullying in the junior grades.
‘‘There’s a lot of banter... but we’re definitely very careful around [that issue].’’
Butler understood that, given Eljae’s history, even friendly ribbing might be too much from a new group of people. In such cases, the club would keep an especially close eye on the child, until they got to know the other children.
Sport NZ chief executive Peter Miskimmin said everyone involved in weekend sport had a responsibility to ensure the experience was a positive one for all involved. Bad sideline behaviour could turn young people off sport.
‘‘That would be extremely sad, because sport should actually enrich their lives.’’