Death a ‘lesson’ for loved ones

Now, she’s not sure about euthanasia, but definitely would not choose it for herself.

‘‘It was only in the last few years working with people in palliative care, working with Hospice Marlborough and realising we can make a huge difference,’’ Carberry said.

‘‘If you end it too soon, you’re perhaps missing out on memories that you can achieve.’’

Beginning in 2016, the Farewell

Trust is an at home hospice care service for people living remotely. Carberry and fellow volunteers are companions to the dying and their families, who choose to remain at home rather than relocate to a hospital.

The controversial End of Life Bill, to legalise assisted dying for the terminally ill, passed 69 to 51 on Wednesday night, sending the final decision to a referendum at next year’s election.

Carberry had concerns that the elderly could be ‘coerced’ by greedy relatives, or that euthanasia could prevent the improvements needed in palliative care.

But she also believed death to be an ‘‘important learning experience’’ for wha¯ nau and friends.

‘‘It’s not making them feel a burden, it’s them giving us a gift, because they’re teaching us what we need to learn about compassion and empathy and how to make it better.’’

While she supported an individual’s right to choose, she believed death to be a healthy part of the grieving process.

‘‘You’re depriving people of the chance to say goodbye, let go, but most of all support you.

‘‘We’ve tended to clinicalise [death], it happens in a hospital, it happens in a hospice if you’re lucky ... but we’re blocking education, and it’s all about learning as a society how we can make it better.’’