This is your life

If you’ve been thinking about writing your memoirs but don’t know where to start, Golden Bay author Charlotte Squire is here to help.

Writing your memoirs or life story is one of those really important things many people mean to do, but never get around to. Or, in my father’s case, he couldn’t see the point in sharing the details of his very ‘‘normal’’ life.

My father was a child of WWII who went onto become a soldier himself, fighting in the Congo and at Suez Canal and being taken prisoner and escaping, twice. That was before sailing to New Zealand. But I digress.

I make a living writing life stories and I’m going to be honest. People’s life stories are often untidy, unpredictable, messy and full of random tangents.

This is the reality of being human and this is why more people don’t write their stories.

But it is possible, with some cunning tricks, to help you break things down and organise your information, so that you can write your own life story. Here’s a breakdown:

Decide who you are writing your book for – will this be a public document? Or for your family and future generations? Or will it be for people to read when you’re gone?

This will clarify what you say in your book. For example, you might want to release all the skeletons from your closet with wild abandon once you’re dearly departed. Or you might want to capture important information about your life and your heritage for your close family. Or you might want your life story to be made available for others to read, in case your story helps other people navigate their own time on this planet.

Brainstorm all the important events, memories, people and places that you feel must be included in your book and write them onto a piece or two of paper. Just willy-nilly, let those ideas flow, don’t over think them, or judge them, just let them come out of you and onto paper. The more relaxed you can be here, the better. Think: waterfall.

Next, we get a bit organised. Try to put a date to those memories. Be as specific as you can, even if you can only take a guess at the year.

Then it’s time to order those moments into a linear time line. You can do this anyway you like, but I suggest decade by decade. Make a big list of all those life events and memories, starting at birth.

Next stage – go through each decade and try to remember more. Are there any more significant people, places, events and memories that you know must be included in your book? Get them in there! Don’t hold back, think of colours, sounds, smells, tastes, it all matters.

Congratulations! You’ve formed the skeleton of your book, plus some bits of the body . . . err muscles and ligaments?

Now start to write. You can start anywhere you like, and the most obvious place is to start at the beginning. Write as many words as you like, decade by decade. You can even break it down into chapter headings as you go, such as ‘‘The day Mr Smith stopped laughing at my jokes and gave me detention.’’

Write in first person, from your perspective, as this is your story and no-one else can tell it quite like you can. Personally, whenever I think of my dad I hear him swearing, and sometimes this makes me smile. Don’t hold back.

Keep writing. Just keep going. Don’t judge your writing. Don’t worry about your spelling (we’re working with a feckless and strange language that was spawned from about six other languages here). Just tell the story of your life.

One memory at a time. Give yourself many rewards as you get through those years, such as time outside in the sunshine, a cup of tea, or a wee piece of chocolate.

Once you’ve got the first draft done: congratulate yourself. Give yourself a pat on the back my friend!

Then, go through the words of your book again and tidy it up. Draft one is always messy. Draft two is for making sure other people understand what you’re saying.

Next, ask someone to look over it to check it for basic spelling and grammar mistakes. Tell them you want to preserve your own voice, but you need someone else to look over it for basic mistakes and to make sure it makes sense.

Dig up the photos to accompany the moments, and write the date, the people (with correct spelling please), and the place on the backs of the photos. I’m saying this partly because one day you won’t be around, but those old photos will be.

Wow! You have reached the layout stage. And you’ve written your book (which is amazing).

If you want to print your book you have options: 1. Get your story onto a computer document, get those pictures in there, with the information you wrote on the back of your photos and make it look pretty. 2. Find a lovely person to help you do this for free. 3. Pay someone with the skills to help you do this.

You are ready to print your book. Again you have options: 1. Print the manuscript yourself at home. 2. Ask your local print shop to pop it into a simple book format and print it for you. 3. Pay a professional to print it for you in a slightly more impressive format.

Congratulations – you have done it! Another pat on the back. Actually I think a little celebration is called for here. Share your story with those you wrote it for and give yourself many high fives, until the novelty fades and you move onto the next big life project such as organising your linen cupboard.

Decide who you are writing your book for – will this be a public document? Or for your family and future generations? Or will it be for people to read when you’re gone? This will clarify what you say in your book. For example, you might want to release all the skeletons from your closet with wild abandon once you’re dearly departed.

Charlotte Squire runs Charlotte Squire Communications, which helps people write and publish life stories and other books. charlottesquirecoms@gmail.co.nz/ 027 525 7455/www.charlottesquire. co.nz